The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My daughter, now 27 went through rehab a few years ago. Met a guy who would put up with NOTHING and she was clean and sober for years. Broke up with him late last year, wound up hanging out with people she shouldn't, although stayed clean. Those people got into some major trouble, forcing her to have to leave the situation behind and move back in with me in March.
As a single mom for all her life (I left her alcoholic father when she was a year old), I've always worked. She came home clean, however while I was at work during the day, she started hanging out with some old friends, who were always trouble.
I found out today that for the last month she's been going to a methadone clinic to wean herself off of roxycodone. Looks like today she lost the job that has been paying for that, she's in a panic, which is why she finally told me.
I took it calmly, getting the info above, not judging, however not offering to help (financially I just cannot afford it), and determined that in the morning I'm going to go with her to the clinic and speak to the counselor myself.
The kind of questions I want to ask will pertain to getting her off of this for good. She has it in her to stay clean, as long as she is not around the stuff, and she has already cut off ALL ties to the troublemakers. New phone#, etc - she is incommunicado, and that's awesome.
In the meantime, she's terrified not to take the methadone, so has also looked at suboxone. Talking to the counselor tomorrow, any advice on what to ask would be appreciated. She's on 60mg a day right now, and they're still ramping that UP.
The serenity prayer is my mantra right now, running through my head over and over. I've done a lot of time in the rooms, although not recently, but have continued to read the daily meditations and work my own program - I'm trying to put the philisophical practices to work, but there's too much of the science/chemistry etc, that I'm clueless about.... Help?
I am so sorry that his difficult situation has invaded your home. It really sounds as if your 27 year old daughter is handling this situation very well. She knows her addiction, and that she is responsible for handling her recovery. She is frightened of not having methodone. We must leave this responsibility with the person who has the addiction. We are powerless over the disease and we should not disempower the addict by trying to take over their responsibilty by speaking for them I was very guilty of this and it never worked!!!
I believe it is wise to go with her to the clinic for moral support. She needs financial help to maintain the program. I hope the clinic will have a social worker to help with that. Let the medical profession and the social service agency review the care and offer suggestions.
Keep an open mind when listening and then come here with with they suggested.
AJ...I got the technical stuff from going to college...could have saved the money cause the answers were in the rooms and I was just chasing an analytical bent which the alcoholic/addict loved because while I was trying to figure out she was 10 miles ahead of me.
You thought your daughter was clean. Oxycondone is a legal prescript that is dealt as widely as meth. Methadone was once used as a heroin replacement recovery drug and now is used also for alcoholics and more. It is addictive and has a horrendos physcological addiction aspect built into it. Those on it become attached to the fear of what might happen when they try to come off of it. One of my AA fellos was on it himself and went thru hell with the fear and his counselor trying to keep him on it before he broke with it. You share reminds me to check back with him to see how he is doing...single father, self employed too UGH!!.
Keep a very open mind regarding what you are listening to and what your expectations are. You are powerless and about to enter management process with a 26 year old.
I use to sponsor an Oxy prescript abuser/addict and using the wisdom of this program and the steps of both memberships...let him go. I am way underequalified to provide love and understanding to the addict and the prescribers who enabled him everytime he wept, raised his voice and pounded on the table for more. They did everything but cut him off or back. In support (((((hugs)))))
