The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
hi family. i dont post often,but im with you everday. well AH has just come out of hospital,he now has hernia,ulcer on the oesophagus,plus a bleed in the stomach. im not counting on this being his bottom,who knows. plus it was our ruby wedding anniversary yesterday. it went unoticed,not one card . how sad is that. i quess my emotions are all over the place,anger and hurt......crap. love ollie xxxxxx
I'm so sorry you are dealing with this! I know how overwhelming the hurt, pain, and anger can be. I've come to learn that suffering is universal. Thank God for alanon.
I wish I had magic to say the right words that would comfort or help you- know you are not alone and please keep coming back.
So sorry to hear that your anniversary went unnoticed. I can relate, my 16 yr anniversary went unnoticed by both myself and my AH. I get so caught up in his crap and well, he gets so caught up in his crap, that it was days before either one of us realized our anniversary came and went. Hang in there, try and do something for yourself today and keep coming back. We are here and listening.
Dear Ollie I too have experienced this I believe it was my 15th Anniversary when the madess was flourishing. I am so sorry that this dreadful disease has taken such a toll on you, your happy celebrations and your hubby's health.
Please try to do something nice for you. After all you succeeded in keeping your marriage vows until the Ruby anniverary. A big achievement!!!You deserve a treat . Please buy yourself some flowers, purchase a tasty cake and celebrate YOU.
I know it is not the same but alanon taught me to make lemonade when life handed me lemons This is the time to do just that.
There is hope and you are not alone. . My hubby did finally find sobriety by my 17th anniversary and remainded sober for 7 years until he passed from cancer.
-- Edited by hotrod on Monday 26th of July 2010 02:58:34 PM
-- Edited by hotrod on Monday 26th of July 2010 10:27:29 PM
So sorry you are going through this. I do know how you feel - I have been there, too. I think some As never do get to their rock bottom.
You can only keep taking care of you. Do things you want to do; meeting friends for a coffee or just ring for a chat. If you worry that they are too busy, send an e-mail or text. And keep coming back here - as I have found, the love and support here is awesome.
Aloha Ollie...Yes the disease dissolves it all. Good that you can come to a place where you are loved unconditionally regardless of what is or isn't going on. Did not ever have a happy anniversary with the addict or the alcoholic/addict I was once married to. How much fun is that? Stick around and get your (((((hugs)))))
I'm so sorry you did not get what you wanted for your wedding anniversary. I do know the ex A who I was involved with eventually did not celebrate much of anything. His alcoholism was that far gone. His health was also on a downhill spiral. That is very very hard to live with.
I hope you can find time to take care of yourself, do something special for yourself. I know for me that was very very dififcult when I was surrounded with such chaos. Nevertheless I do think there are moments in the day when we can turn "off" the worry, sadness and despair. For me those moments were few and far between for a long long time. I work on making more of them.
You are feeling perfectly normal....you have every right to have every emotion you are having.
The symptoms you have decribed may just be the bottom my friend......I watched this happen to my husband.....If he doesn't stop it may be a bottom he can not recover from.
I will keep you in my prayers and you take it easy on you.
thank you all so much. its good to know you all really do understand. i did go out today,and treat myself,normally i do try to work my programme,and look after me. it just brought it home how much i hate this . well he has been told if he continues to drink he will die of eternal bleeding,his choice. love you all xxxx ollie
