As a child, I would be anxious until my alcoholic dad was safely home. (Even then, who knew what would happen when he got home? ) I would look throughout the big  house as a little kid, ending at the garage.  If his car were not in the garage, I knew he wasn't in. Then I figured  out to go first to the garage.  duh
I'm old now. When I expect my husb to be home and he isn't, I start that anxiety but fight going through the bedrooms or even to the garage. I try to distract myself doing what I would normally. I may start something special. Inevitably, he comes downstairs from a nap or from something benign he had been enjoying. Sometimes he comes in the front door.
Today it didn't cross my mind to do any of these things. He came in and asked if I had missed him.
Thank you AlAnon.  If I think I'm not progressing as quickly as I should, it's immaterial. I'm getting it. Even to realize I hadn't missed him because I was enjoying some time alone is such a gift!