The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I recently had a resentment with a sponsee. We worked it out and each apologized but now I am experiencing 2 people ion our group that are avoiding eye contact with me. She is friends with these two people, as am I. I want to say something to all parties but am at a loss as to what I would say. I did not go to any of her friends to talk about it as I don't believe in character assassination. Any suggestions as to an approach that might work...or shall I just continue praying about it and praying for them?
My belief is what other people think of me is none of my business Thier feelings or thoughts are thier problem. As you have already apologized to your sponsee and she accepted i would leave it at that.. what ever happened was between the 2 of you and you do not need to explain yourself to parties not involved. Thats just my opinion... likely it will all blow over
When I learned that it is normal, even against principles, for people to seek comfort in other peoples participation and that I have done it myself it was all forgivable and I lost the fear of it. It no longer moves me and I don't have anything to confront other than my own reactions to it. A sponsor/sponsee position is by far a wide area to move in. My sponsees get to watch and at times participate in my program. Some times they get to be my sponsor if I am humble enough. So let it happen and continue to be a part of the solution.
A sponsee and several members of my other side of recovery got to watch my response to the event I posted as "...practice these principles..." I didn't know it at the time that it would be a lesson for me and at the same time for others. Up to now it has all gone as willed...not mine, not the other persons, but HP's. No room for anger, no room for resentments, or any other self centered fear.
You have done your part by apologizing , now let it go .. and u might suggest a topic for next meeting on anonimity . what your expectations are etc . If I talk to someone one on one I expect it to stay there , if it is something i share in a meeting it dosent matter to me because I have already figured it out .
