The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Oh my goodness I have had a day. Went to the jail to visit son went ok however don't think I will put it on my priority list soon. Then I can home and found out that there has been a qlitch with getting med records to the insurance company. Actually this has been going on for about 3 weeks. I want to have a screaming fit with someone. I find that when I do not react in that manner that tears usually come. I have never been much of a crier so I find this interesting. I'll have to think about it.
I have 3 or 4 calls in and messages left, so I have to practice some good old patience. Never been my strong suit but it is on the priority list with my alanon program.
So right now I am close to being suspended from work, no insurance money coming in. I have to try and remind myself that I have done all I can and just need to let the results follow. Easy to type.
Hopefully I can get this resolved once and for all!
It sounds like a DAY!!! Try to take deep braths Glad you came here and posted Venting does help!!
I hear you. I too found that I used my anger to cover up sadness and when I did not permit myself to scream and act out I cried and felt sad and frightened.
I guess that is why I changed these feelings into anger- It made me feel powerful and I thought I could then force the world to behave in a manner I needed.
I hear a great deal of hope, trust and acceptance in your share. The program is working.
I also found that using alanon's great tools of: Praying, Living Odat, Not Projecting, Letting Go and Letting God and Taking the Actions and Letting go of the results, I found I no longer needed to use anger or feel sad and lost.
I could use these tools and have the feelings of Courage, Serenity and Wisdom I will take those any day.
Well you are certainly not alone. The disease of alcholism causes deep deep ravages in those around the disease. I am sorry you have had to deal with going to a jail(I can't imagine that is a pleasant experience).
I know for me personally the program works on a mysterious level. Of course I would like to wipe out the financial and emotional consequences of having lived with an alcoholic/addict for years and having grown up in a insane environment. I have to keep letting go and letting God into my life. This group is one way to do that. The more I can relate to other people and their pain and their issues the better.
I know my own life is still very very affected by having lived with an alcoholic and indeed living around alcoholics/addicts. Even this morning one of my neighbors was absolutely blotto drunk and had no idea he was being loud, obnoxious and totally self absorbed. I did not allow it to affect me because I was up anyway but it I were trying to sleep it would be another matter. I have had to remind myself that alcoholics belive they are the only ones who "feel" or rather have a right to "feel" and make their needs known and it is always all on their terms.
I can understand the frustration of dealing with waiting for something that should be simple. If you can get the name of the person who will deal with the issue you can follow up be it by telephone or email. Names are helpful.
Expectations are so important for me. I have to put things in perspective. I have to work really really hard on not taking it all so personally.
