The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I am having trouble understanding the question , depending on how old your nieces are there is literature for them if they are younger , Al-Anon prints a book for pre teens called Whats drunk Mama ? and if t hey are teen agers there are daily readers that will help them . ADAT * a day at a time * writtn by teens for teens . also published by Al-Anon.
Changing Lanes with Samual Jackson, ... he is a recovering alcoholic in the movie trying to make things right with his family, do the right thing by a man he had a wreck with, etc... the movie starts with him trying to do the next right thing, and ends with the results of having done it.
John
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" And what did we gain? A new life, with purpose, meaning and constant progress, and all the contentment and fulfillment that comes from such growth."
"When a Man Loves a Woman", with Meg Ryan & Andy Garcia..... Meg Ryan plays an alcoholic, and the family goes through all the pains and frustration with that...
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"He is either gonna drink, or he won't.... what are YOU gonna do?"
"What you think of me is none of my business"
"If you knew the answer to what you are worrying about, would it REALLY change anything?"
"When a Man Loves a Woman", with Meg Ryan & Andy Garcia..... Meg Ryan plays an alcoholic, and the family goes through all the pains and frustration with that...
My neices would just roll their eyes if I tried to give them literature or said "let's talk about alcoholism"
I was thinking a movie might bring up some of the points that would be good to talk about. Then we aren't talking about them. We are talking about the movie and the characters. But the lessons would still be there.
Maybe after talking about the characters, we could move into the differences and similarities with their family life.
They are ages 12 and 16. The 12 yr old is more open to talking - sometimes. The 16 yr old is most likely to roll her eyes and act above such discussions but she will sometimes talk about such things. I have the girls over sometimes and was going to leave literature in the room when they are here but I don't think they would read it unless maybe I spark some interest.
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Serenity is not freedom from the storm but peace within the storm.
There is SO much dysfunction illustrated on television.
Pick any reality TV show and you'll likely get a good dose of it.
I watch "The Bad Girl's Club" with my teenage stepdaughter (a guilty pleasure of mine... being an Al-Anon I DO love the drama, lol). Sometimes I'll make miscellaneous comments about the bizarre behavior that the girls are portraying - "Oh, see, she's so drunk and unhappy with herself she's got to take her insecurities out on everyone else." "A healthy person would be able to just walk away from a comment like that." and so on and so forth.
So many reality TV shows - especially those geared towards the teen and younger 20's crowds - are RIPE with examples of unhealthy behavior.
Now, shows that display a family working with good principles in the face of that bad behavior are a little more scarce, in my opinion. Silly (and sad) as it sounds, Supernanny is a good one - although she's dealing with children, a lot of active alcoholics behave very similar to anxious, unhappy children. The way in which the Nanny interacts with these kids is a great model of healthy, responsible, non-reactive behavior.
"When a Man Loves a Woman" is a fantastic movie, although, Meg's husband in the movie certainly portrays an un-treated Al-Anon up until the very end, which doesn't leave much for a great example of a healthy interaction with an alcoholic.
Movies addressing abuse would be great, too. As, unfortunately, may active alcoholics behave abusively in one form or another around their families. I love the movie "The Secret Life of Bees", it's about a girl who ran away from her abusive father.
Hope these ideas help. (And good luck with the teenagers - they're sharp and it's hard to try to slip in "educational" speak without them catching on and immediately falling back into the "yeah, whatever. I already know all of this" position).
I really love the movie "when a man loves a woman" - it was the very first movie that actually made me cry - I was relating to my mom but didn't really realize it. It took a few viewings to bring those realizations closer to the surface. But it might be a good catalyst if either of your nieces "recognize" some of the behaviors - and it might get them talking or thinking...
And don't show them "leaving las vegas" without watching it first yourself. It has some very disturbing scenes in it and they might not be ready for it. Heck - I'm still not ready to see that movie again and I am 38!!
SM: all those movies are good--I think I have seen them all--I recommend them for you & your nieces if that is what you need! I have a specific need for recovery movies with a message! Kathleen
