The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I am a very grateful member of this programme and i have had great experiences ever since joining al fews years ago. However i have my driving test comimg up next week and this will be my fourth attempt i have prayed about it and i thought i had completely handed over this situation to my HP but as the day draws closer my confidence seems to be shaken. I would appreciate your positive support and i look forward to hearing from you. Thank you **
For me, ya start by taking one day and focusing on it only. Doing the best I can.
I breath deeply, and I have learned now, when I do take one day at a time, things always work out.
I learned to do the steps and leave the outcome to hp.
So I guess ya study, and practice and do your best each day.
When ya go do your test, think of the serenity prayer. You know you can do the test. Relax, breath. If you have to do it again, well so?
You are not failing, you just have more you need to learn.
I told my students that allll the time. We are always too hard on ourselves.
Hp is right there with you. Realize that, think about that when ya do the driving thing Forget the word test, think of it as seeing how well you can drive.
I am sure by now you know what ya need to work on.
It takes a lot of courage to post your fears. I applaud you in doing this. I will say some prayers for you this upcoming week .
I too had a similar experience two weeks ago. I had a test in Math (it's been 25 years since high school and I have gone back to school for my degree). So I can relate. This is what I did. I practiced, practiced, practiced and I prayed and listened to HP, whom I call God.
When I fail at something, it does shake my confidence as well. Prior to one of my tests, I did not sleep for two nights. But with practice and prayer, I did really well on my test.
I have over the last three years had my 3 children go for their license. This is what I did to help them. I let them drive everywhere. Every opportunity to go somewhere, I put them in the driver's seat to give them the experience. If you can, drive each day. The day before their test, I took them out and had them do everything that I knew would be on the driving test for one last time to help them know that they could do it and to build their confidence. There are things that you are going to have to be able to do. In the state of Mass, you have to back up 500' in a straight line; they take you through an intersection with lights to see if you know the Arrow rules; and a 3 point turn, starting and stopping of course and seatbelts and being sure you check all directions when you pull out, etc. Practice all those skills and then say your prayers at night or in the morning .
And then let go and let God -- Relax. State troopers expect you to be nervous, but if you are too nervous you are apt to make mistakes. 1) Practice 2) Pray and listen 3) Relax and let go and let God.
I hope this helps. I wish you the very best and will be looking forward to your results. I am in chat or if I don't see you there, let me know how you made out by posting.
Maria123
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If I am not for me, who will be? If I am only for myself, then who am I? If not now, when?
Thank you very much for your inspiring thoughts.I would like to let u know that am taking my test in the UK but i do understand driving is a universal thing. I appreciate your wisdom and consolation. I must admit that its significant progress for me to be able to express my fears. I ve been in the programme 4 3 years and is just recently i have started opening up to people. I seem to be able to be laying off my guard which is a fantastic thing for me coz my shuting down has been a great barrier to my recovery. Thanx to my HP am getting there. I have been a regular visitor to this site but everytime i try to attempt posting, i become nervous n therefore unable to proceed. I also attend f/f mtgs and have found that helpful. For me it has been a slow process thru this journey but am convinced that there was a reason for this. Nevertheless my growth has manifested in many other different ways as i am much saner and my life is more managable. I also feel very hopeful and am able to appreciate what i have today. Thanks once again and i will keep u informed of my perfomance on Tue. May Go bless u all mightly.
It is so nice to see you posting. What progress in your program. I too admire your courage and your honesty. For me the thing I would say is to breathe and breathe and relax. So many of us hold our breath when we are stressed and don't even know it. We also clench our teeth and tense up our shoulders which actually can cut off oxygen/blood flow to our brains. I have been taught to tense up the a certain area for a moment, hold, and then relax them such as face,,neck,,shoulder,,while breathing slowly and calmly. Just a tip that has worked for me. I will put you on my prayer list too. Maybe come to this chatroom before the test and tell us what is going on,,,,even if you have to yell at us to get our attention LOL. And come back after your test and let us know how it went. We get great support here. your friend in recovery, cdb :)
Thank you once again debilyn,maria123 and cdb. I am extremely joyous 4 ur support and encouragement.Fortunately or unfortunately i Failed my test again!!! To be honest with u i gave the whole thing the best shot and i was convinced that i did my best n 4 sure it was my best for one good reason as i was disqualified 3 minutes towards the end of that (35 mins)test session. Why? according to my instructor he reckoned that i was supposed to 2 b driving along a bus lane during off peak hours" even though during this time the road was very quiet and clear apart from the fact that 1 particular driver emerged speedingly from behide and overtook my car from the left hand side and i seemed the one who payed a penalty because of someone else's ignorance.Contrary, the same instructor explained that i was an excellent driver so kinda mixed msgs.Anyway that was my encounter for the day even though i was deeply hurt by the outcome, i was able 2 go thru all those unpleasant emotions and thanks 2 my HP coz i was able 2 accept the results and i didnot blame myself either. This was because i did everything possible that was in my power and allowed my higher power 2 take care of the rest. I am eternally grateful for this programme because "i am now able to differentiate between things that i can do and things that i cannot do" This has helped me to cope in various situation, i have stopped blaming other 4 my dissappointments in life and I now participate actively in my life other than just being a survivor or a joy rider.Am also grateful for this experience has enabled me in reaching out 4 help which is unusual 4 me but am glad coz i can now honestly testify that i have been blessed by u all and i hope someone else was blessed too. Have lovely moments. BIG HUGS & I LOVE U ALL. NB bear with me as i was unable 2 visit the chat rm last nite coz i had an early nite.:
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