The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
hello again. i hope it is ok to post almost every day but i am finding it really helpful to share my thoughts this way and mention anything that is really bothering me as i cant get to a one to one group at the moment (i live 6 miles out of town and AH has kept the car). a thought hit me today that i am actually not as distressed as i thought i would be having moved out of the family home. i am remarkable calm and matter of fact about everything. i am still feeling sad that we have reached the separation stage but i am actually quite enjoying the freedom of not having to clean up his empty lager tins, not having to put him to bed because he cant walk, being able to put things where i want them, being able to stay in bed if i want to. My IBS is playing up something awful with the cold but i am manageing it a whole lot better than if i was at home with AH running about after him. one of my friends came to visit last night and commented on how calm i am. she said she expected me to be really angry that i had been forced to move out and start over. it occurred to be that i havent been angry for ages....i have just accepted that he behaves the way he does because of his illness and there is nothing i can do about it. its quite liberating to have reached this stage as i can focus clearly on the things i need to do to put my life in some sort of order. i have also found that my sense of humour is returning and i have learnt a valuable lesson......
concentrate on the things that i can change to make my life pleasant! :thumbsup
miss lucy, good for you! Post as much as often as you like. I can relate to the sense of humor thing. I was surprised last night to find myself laughing out loud, something I haven't done since I don't know when. It sure felt good! You may want to try the online meetings here. I attend several a week and find them really helpful. Enjoy your new home, keep coming here and keep on posting.
Both of you are---------- "Taking care of yourself first"---------- I loved reading both of your posts. Amazing how this program gives back to us what the disease had taken away. Small victories each day strengthen our resolve. As we get more and more of the program under our belt, our confidence improves, we have acceptance and a sence of freedom that comes as we continue to apply it to our lives. And, when we have an occasional step back we don't have to beat ourselves up anymore because we know our program allows us to start over any time we choose. It works if you work it. How true.