The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
i've shared serveral times on this site and recieved great words of widom and encouragment and I am more grateful than you could ever know..
this message is to say that my Abf passed away early sunday morning after a struggle with alcohol. He was 31 years old and the absolute love of my life. Even though we had just 3 short years together , thru the ups and downs, still the best after it is all said and done.
he was a wonderful,caring,loving man who couldnt no matter hard he tried to stop drinking couldnt. Ive come to the realization that in his eyes he was the best person that he could be, just not strong enough to be able to kick this addiction. after sorting thru his belongings and things, i came across a diary he kept.
As I read and then read some more.... i saw what an everyday struggle it was for him to remain sober , even if it was for the one day.
why does it take an approach to look at this in a different light to see how sad and upset that he was that he REALLY couldnt beat it...he hated himself for not having the willpower to stop.
the choice is yours, whether you decide to leave or stay... i chose to stay (it happened very quickly).... im glad i was here when he got really sick, because if I wasnt, he would have been here alone and passed away himself and by himself
Again, he was the love of my life for the person that he was ,,,, not for what addiction was.
I am so very sorry for your loss. I understand that this man was the love of your life and a wonderful person. The reading of his journals did shed some light on his world. I am sorry your heart is breaking and I am so glad you came here to share .
My son was 41 year old when he lost his battle with this deadly disease. I, like you stayed in his home when it became obvious that his disease might win. I am also glad I did.
Please take care of yourself. Do come back to alanon and share your grief journey. You are not alone.
I pray that you and your boyfriend find the peace you both deserve.
-- Edited by hotrod on Thursday 17th of December 2009 12:24:13 AM
-- Edited by hotrod on Thursday 17th of December 2009 01:03:11 AM
THANK YOU....FUNERAL WAS TODAY AND I THOUGHT I MIGHT SHARE ON HERE AS WELL. WITHIN 48 HOURS HE WAS GONE.. LIGHT NAUSEA... ALL OF A SUDDEN LIFE SUPPORT.... I TOOK HIS ADDICITION AND THREW IT OUT OF THE WINDOW AT THAT POINT AND WAS AT HIS SIDE ...IT IS THE PERSON INSIDE THAT IS WHAT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING. THANK U ....
I read this very early this morning when I woke up. I cried very hard. This is definately the reality of this disease. I am sad for you but happy that he no longer suffers. My dad never got into recovery and suffered with much shame and guilt. When he passed it was almost a relief that he could be with HP and suffer no longer.
I'm sorry for your loss. I can't imagine what you are going thru, but I'll pray that HP gives you peace and strenght. And thank you for reminding us what an waful disease this is and that we should be merciful with their atruggle.
__________________
Self-pity in its early stages is as snug as a feather mattress. Only when it hardens does it become uncomfortable.
I just love the unconditional acceptance that shines through in your post.
I lost my AMom to cirrhosis almost a month ago, and it really brought home to me how powerful this disease is.
__________________
Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could... Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense. - Emerson
Dear Laynie, I am so sorry. He must have been a very special man. May the memories of rhe happy times and of the care you gave him sustain you. Hugs, Temple
__________________
It's easy to be graceful until someone steals your cornbread. --Gray Charles
My heart is breaking for you - I am crying. I'm so very sorry for your loss. I hate this disease and how it takes those we love. You were gracious and understanding. I am praying that you find peace.
My deepest condolances on your loss. I lost my beloved Tim just over 1 1/2 years ago. I know how hard it is for you. Let the happy memories comfort you. I can tell you from experience that you will come out the other side of this. It may not seem like it now, but you will. The memories will be of comfort to you, as they were to me. Sending you extra love and blessings at this time. Peace be with you.
In sympathy, Karilynn
__________________
It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR KIND WORDS AND SUPPORT AT THIS VERY DIFFICULT TIME.
THE ONLY THING I FIND ANY COMFORT IN KNOWING IS THAT HE IS NO LONGER STRUGGLING WITH HIS ADDICTION AND HE IS AT PEACE..... FOR ME, IM GOING THROUGH THE MOTIONS OF IT ALL. I MISS HIM, I LOVE HIM AND HE WAS AND IS THE BEST PERSON IVE EVER KNOWN...... IN TIME I GUESS IS WHAT THEY SAY...... AGAIN I WANT TO THANK U ALL......ONE DAY AT A TIME
I cried when I read your post. Hope you can find find some peace now.
I found this quote the other day:
"When love is lost, do not bow your head in sadness; instead keep your head up high and gaze into heaven for that is where your broken heart has been sent to heal." - Anonymous
Love, Tish xx
-- Edited by Tattyhead on Saturday 19th of December 2009 03:43:37 PM
