The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
It has been a week today since XABF was throwin in jail for breaking into my house. Has been a tough week, murphy's law i guess. Everything went wrong this week and I mean I was on overdrive. Work was tough, kids were acting out, even my dog ran away twice. I thought I would be commited. Well, I still got up every morning and did the mom routine, went to work and did what had to be done even though I did not want to. I was sitting here tonight realizing, WOW a whole week has gone by and I survived. I am so grateful to have survived and now i have decided I am going to do nothing all week that requires thought or stress. I am going to do the hobbies I neglected for so long and treat myself to a mini vacation at home. But what I truly realized is, I am getting better! A few months ago I would have been a basket case, would have been trying to find info out on my XABF and would have driven myself crazy. This time I have had no contact, no loss of sleep and have only lost it twice. lol I am so filled with grattitude tonight! I have this program, my family who is my rock and friends who can make me smile. I know i am tired of survivng and am now ready to thrive! I guess my morale of my story is, God Grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, The courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. Who woulda thought I would ever be able to make the change, accept reality and move forward? Dont get me wrong, I still have sadness for the loss of the A in my life and memories that will be cherished forever...But for today, I am free to live, free to be me. I know I will be up and down for awhile, but i honestly think I truly got sick and tired of being sick and tired and it has made it such much simplier. Everyone has to walk there journey, find there peace in their own time and way. When the time is right, you will have the courage and ability to do what you need to do to change. Until that point, keep praying it works.
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What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself. Hecato, Greek philosopher
I am going through some difficulties too. I have seen that by working this program my HP has given me some awareness of what I am learning now and the ability to see some growth. Sometimes I feel like I am watching me like I would watch a movie and I can't believe that the person I am seeing is me and I am proud of her.
"This time I have had no contact, no loss of sleep and have only lost it twice." -----what a powerful statement there and that right there shows me so much growth!
Keep up the good work. Don't be scared, be proud! You are getting it!
Yours in recovery, Mandy
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"We are not punished for our unforgiveness, we are punished by it" Jim Stovall
ahh, great! This post's title threw me off bc in the thread, u dont talk about any recurring fearfulness about the future, nice. Enjoy your growth, you have earned it. Sorry u had a rough week, but (like u sd) u survived it! All things pass.
I think the trick is to stay in right now & today and enjoy where you are. It's all growth and progress. Applying this program to our lives and working it, well the changes in us are nothing short of a miracle. I'm happy for you (((((inhisarms))))))
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Light, Love, Peace, Blessings & Healing to Us All. God's Will Be Done. Amen.
