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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Update on me
Post Info TOPIC: Update on me
carolinagirl


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Update on me
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I'm going to be brief...

Well I'm going to try.... :)

Had another altercation with oldest daughter yesterday morning and police were called.  I am going to work to get her into a group home or wilderness camp before it's too late (sorry Debilyn).  I am at the end of the line with her and all the counseling in the world has not helped.  She creates chaos non stop and then the other two follow suit and it is unmanagable and destroying all of us.  When she is gone there is peace and serenity in the house.  She has no respect for herself or anyone else.  I would send her to live with family but no one will take her.  Her attitude has affected her behavior (truancy, failing all academic classes, manipulating boys to get what she wants, possibly some sex and drugs, no goals, flat out defiance of every rule or responsibility and she is physically and verbally abusive to her sister and brother and it is damaging them) and she is now at a point where I feel I can not help her anymore and I can't rein her in. 

Ex AH is still on the couch, that is going ok although I wonder on a daily basis what kept me with him so long.  He will probably be staying a little longer now that I have this situation with my daughter as I need his help and he is somewhat helpful.

I met a guy at a singles site online who turned out to be big into astrology and told me that my ex boyfriend is the closest thing I will ever have in my life to a soul mate and he has only seen a better match once in the time he has been doing this.  Then he says in two months we will both be open to being together again and it will happen.  We shall see...  I told him if he was trying to get a a date he wasn't doing a very good job LOL.

I have lost 40 lbs since he and I split up and intend to lose 30 more during that two months of total non communication.  I have decided to believe the astrologer and it has helped me to have a more positive attitude and get the focus back on myself instead of looking for someone to be with.  I have nothing to lose so why not...

I am working and going to school for my master's every other weekend and that has been stressful somewhat.  I think the biggest stress is trying to figure out how to deal with my oldest daughter and trying to find reliable child care for the other two so that I can finish my degree. 

And these are the days of my life... lol

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Andrea12


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Wow you sure do have  you share of worries dear friend, I will pray for you daughter to get it. she is your daughter you know what the best call is for her, do what you have to do to save her.

This world of addiction can be pure and simple hell...I always say I know I am going to heaven because I have been to the other place already....and dear lady I am sure there is a spot up there for you as well.

I am also going to pray for your other children sometimes we don't see the affects that an upside down life causes for a long time....It took me yrs to see the affects it had on my daughter, but my son showed anger right away.

You are in my thoughts and prayers, one day at a time.

Love ya,
Andrea

-- Edited by Andrea12 on Tuesday 1st of December 2009 11:10:47 AM

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Rita G


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thoughts and prayers for you and your family as y'all continue your path of healing from this horrid disease!

HUGS,
Rita


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Debilyn


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lol silly lady. I suggested survival wilderness counseling years ago! That is a great idea.

You have done your best and you have hung on and ya still are. I see you thinking with a clearer head these days. Making progress.

There isn't a man who is confusing you right now. You sound healthy how you are handling the ex.

Catherine Freer is a great, responsible survival group that has a great record. My son and his friend both went and the boys are great adults. Believe me they were a handlful!

Wish I was younger I would take her in and do my theraputic foster home thing with her.
Some tough kids went thru that here. I sure enjoyed them but it was not easy.

Maybe you could see if there are theraputic foster homes there?

hugs hon. congrats on getting healthier!! That is HUGE. hugs,debilyn



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maresie


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I don't believe in "soul mates"  I think there are mature responsible relationships.    I firmly believe they are by choice rather than destined.  Magical thinking is not my forte any more.    I know what it cost me.  I don't like reality one bit but it is a whole lot better than all the fantasies I dreamed up of "rescue", "merger" and not being alone.  I prefer being alone to that as the cost is enormous.

Maresie.

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maresie
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