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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Conflict of Interest?
Post Info TOPIC: Conflict of Interest?
sdisnie


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Conflict of Interest?
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Anyone know anything about lawyer stuff???

The company my AH works for is a small company that is owned by two guys that are also his buddies. They both have issues as well, with alcohol and drugs problems. Anyway, the one owner, Jason, he's getting a divorce from his wife. Well...his wife owns a portion of the company as well, she is also the one who invested money in this company to get it started. She's got a lawyer investigating all the expenses and such going thro the company, which her and i both know from the past that Jason has used a lot of money for drugs and other things. The other guy has been cooking his books a bit, and he's currently having $5000 sent to his house every month from the company and this girl has no idea why yet.......


Ok, so then come to find out, this company gave my AH money to obtain his atty for our divorce, this atty I just found out is the same one Jason is using for his divorce. When I told the attys my concerns for my children and how I didn't want them around the environment and people that my husband hangs out with, I mentioned how one of the owners has a current restraining order against him and has known drug and alcohol issues. She's basically swept my concerns under the table, but I have to know that she knows exactly what I'm talking about since he is her client!!!!

Could this be a conflict of interest at all??


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serendipity


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I'm not sure I understand your question...if the lawyer is representing your ex and his friend, I do not believe that would be a conflict. It would be a conflict if the lawyer was reprsenting your ex and you. That's impossible. Is the lawyer representing you and ex's friend? I don't know if that would be conflict of interest, but it would be rather boundry-less and slimey and If I were you, I'd find another lawyer.

As it is, if your lawyer is blowing off your concerns about your ex's drinking and drugging then it may be time to find a new lawyer.

I found the best lawye in the whole world thru a reference from my local DV shelter. That could be a place to start. My lawyer was so excellent and I felt totally protected and like she was there to fight for me and the kids. Best money I have ever spent.

The lawyer I had before that one was so bad, I reported him to the state bar. He would talk to my ex as if he was a client even tho my ex wasn't paying him...I WAS!!!! And he didn't believe anything I told him about my ex's abuses or drug addiction. THAT lawyer was why things escalated between me and my ex. That lawyer almost got me killed.


So, you can always switch lawyers if you're not comfortable with her outside contacts.

Good luck.

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Debilyn


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Attorneys represent people who are into all kinds of things.

So telling them anything is more like gossip.

Also if I were you I would be very careful. A person can have things back fire on them and get sued for slander.

If what you said to her endangered or took away anothers livlihood, a person could find themselves in big trouble.

Laws, attorneys, judges etc. are not always there protecting who or what is right.

From what I have seen I don't trust any of them one tiny bit.

And one of my best most respected friends is a retired judge. He is from the "old school" before things were like they are now.

love,debilyn



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Putting HP first, always  <(*@*)>

"It's not so much being loved for ourselves, but more for being loved in spite of ourselves."

       http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/meeting.html            Or call: 1-888-4alanon
sdisnie


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I know it sounds all confusing, I'm confused as well. I guess its just all bothered me because this small company and the family of one of the owners is SO involved in everything. Like I said, they all socialize together and drink and God only knows what else.  So basically, his atty is representing both him and one of the owners of the company.

As for lawyers...I have nothing, no money, I've been a stayathome mom working part time for the last 16 years, so while his company paid for his attorney, I had to email every atty around me begging someone to help me and take on my case. So i really have no choice in the matter. They have been nice and helpful to me, but I'm still confused on why neither lawyer is thinking his drinking is that big of a deal....I almost feel as though I'm crazy or something??

-- Edited by sdisnie on Saturday 21st of November 2009 01:11:11 AM

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Mattie


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A lawyer's job is to put his client's situation in the best possible light, not to judge the client -- that is the judge's job.  Each lawyer serves as an advocate for the person who pays him -- that is his job.  So the fact that his client may have some faults or problems is irrelevant; the lawyer's job is to represent that person in court and plead his case.  The guys in the company are paying the lawyer, and so the lawyer is only concerned with pleading their case in court.  It would only be a conflict of interest if they were suing each other and the same lawyer were representing them both; then the lawyer would have to step down in one of the cases.

You do need a lawyer that is in your employ alone, to plead your case.  E-mail isn't usually an effective way of getting a lawyer, I'm afraid.  I've always found that it works better by phone.  If you're short of money, Legal Aid may be able to help.  People have said that Domestic Violence shelters or Battered Women's shelters often know about lawyers that have experience litigating against alcoholic spouses.  They probably know lawyers that have sliding-scale fees also.  Do get a lawyer on your side, however you can -- this is an important fight.  I feel for you; it's hard and frustrating when you don't have many resources to pay, but I hope you can prevail anyway.  If your husband has some money, your lawyer may be able to get you spousal support and/or legal fees from him, which could help.  I know cases where this has happened, and your sixteen years as a stay-at-home mom may work in your favor here.  Please don't be discouraged!

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serendipity


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I would suggest that you call your local DV shelter. They know which lawyers understand the family disase of alcoholism and have reduced or sliding scale fees. There is always the possibility that the judge will make your ex pay your attoney's fees along with his own just based on the fact that he makes more money than you.

I had to beg and borrow to get the lawyer I had and she was worth every cent. She knew I  was NOT crazy, she understood that depite his outward apperance, my x was insane and she validated me at every turn. She was a shark in navigating the legal system and she had my children's best interests at heart.

Like a night and day difference from my previous lawyer who told me "in divorce, men are branded "aholes" and women are "ladydogs". Your ex just doesn't want to see you driving aroud in a new car while he is making child support payments to you!" confuse 

Wow. Talk about a BAD lawyer....and I know far more bad lawyers than good. So, do what you have to do to make sure you feel that you and your kids are being taken care of. For me, it was the most important fight of my life and kids life.

-- Edited by serendipity on Saturday 21st of November 2009 08:38:49 AM

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Debilyn


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sweetheart the first attorney we had to get was to get a meth addict out of our rental.

Guess what, the attorney was a flaming A! He fell asleep once when we went to see him.

Now I have learned it is known he and others are addicts, coke addicts mostly.

Just like some actors, they get money they try drugs and that is that.

sigh

Anyway hon this is one I would give to hp for sure. We never know. What if a full time job came up for you? Or a friend says hey move in here until you get more  work?

I have seen how hp works and for me it has never been what I thought I needed.

I wanted my a to be sober, on program and  back to him as much as he could be. I never expected he would find that in prison.

I seriously want a mate. I keep asking but nothing happens. I wonder why? I really do. but I have grown and lots more.

hugs, I know it is ever so much harder when kiddos are involved. love,debilyn

__________________

Putting HP first, always  <(*@*)>

"It's not so much being loved for ourselves, but more for being loved in spite of ourselves."

       http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/meeting.html            Or call: 1-888-4alanon
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