The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
It says in the closing of our meetings "If you keep and open mind you will find help." I had my mind open this evening and heard the tool "Detachment" and the slogan "Let go and let God" and the very same time. Detachment...getting out of HPs way. I like it!! Tonight was another great meeting done from the reading for 11/09 in Courage to Change. If you have the book look it up. If you don't have the book see if there is one available at a face to face meeting. (((((MIP)))))
It never ceasus to amaze me, how the answers come and why, I had been detaching really well I thought, and then I got blind sided all over again, I allowed myself to get drawn into our daughter and my husbands misunderstanding, and ended up becoming the foucus of thier problem, I beat myself up so badly and then you post this and I have just read september 11th page 255 courage to change, and I feel like I never read this page before even though I thought I read the book over times, maybe I had read it before, and it just wasn't relevant at the time, so this is awareness right?
I love your take on things Jerry F, you come at things from a very unique thought provoking angle, thankyou for being here.
I agree 11-9 in Courage 2 Change is an great topic for a meeting. Another gift of this program and focusing on myself. Before alanon, I could always see others attepmts to manipulate but I was blind to my own efforts. Now thanks to this program and the tools I no longer need to manipulate and can take risks while depending on HP' Let Go and Let Go is a wonderful way to detach
Letting Go and Letting God was so hard for me. I felt like if I wasn't doing anything I'd go in circles. When I detached (and am still trying to) from the A, it was amazing all the work I could God doing in MY own life. When I let go and let him do his work, the postivie changes I recognize in myself are so beautiful. It has made things easier for me in reference to detaching from my A, because when I notice that I am about to cross a boundry that I set, I take a second thought about it and normally decide that the boudary was initially set to protect me and realize that if I cross it I may interfear in GODs work in my life.
Alot of I's and Me's in the post, but I must that GOD that it feels great to find myself again.
Let Go and Let God to me, meant getting rid of the superhero complex I had, I just had to save the day. But the day I said God this is in your hands now I felt that weight just lift up and I could finally breath. I guess the superhero cape was a bit too heavy LOL
Thanks for the great words.
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Self-pity in its early stages is as snug as a feather mattress. Only when it hardens does it become uncomfortable.
You ladies are the teachers..."If I keep and open mind I will find help..." Reading your replies with a wide open mind I find myself feeling humbled; teachable. I am grateful to be allowed to participate...Thank you God. (((((hugs)))))
I am new to ALANON (my first week) and last night really struggled with understanding how to "let go and let god" and "detachment". I mean I literally struggled with understanding in my mind and in my heart how to let go of my ex and lift him up to HP. I read C2C (small book) over and over on surrendering and finally understood. I prayed and the realization came to me that I tried so hard to control my ex before he left. I wanted to get married so I knew he would stay with me and not left me. Well my greatest fear was realized when he left me! I realized it was that control that made my life so unmanageable - trying to control our relationship, his life and our life together - did not work! I never want to get to that level of control again, so I finally understood how I wanted to let HP's will prevail in my life and not my own will. I realized how my controlling things did not work - it obiviously did not work for me in my life with my ex. I am still working to "let go" but this was a huge "ah ha" moment for me. I did keep my mind open and I did find help and I am sooo glad after 30 years of needing Alanon - that I am finally on the path to healing.
Welcome Jill. I love those "ah ha" momenst as you call them. I have a lot of those since coming into this program. Keep coming back and working the program.
(((Jill)))
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Self-pity in its early stages is as snug as a feather mattress. Only when it hardens does it become uncomfortable.
"Getting out of HP's way". What a great way to explain detachment. Detachment has always been so hard for me to define in just a few words. With your post that has changed. I liked it so much that I have already called three members of my group to pass it on, no, give it away.