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Ok so the night that I had my run in with the spider I was making spaghetti for dinner. It is a family fav and really easy to make.
I make my sauce from scratch...so my first thought was that most spaghetti has the same base...a tomato base. The base is like the traditions. They make this program what it is. You can't have a tomato base with out tomatoes and if you tried well it wouldn't be as good. (I tried imagining what a fake tomato base would taste like..I had a low calorie pizza one time (it was oh so gross) and that is what a fake tomato taste would be like for me). And you have to stick to all the traditions to keep the integrity of the program. Without the traditions the steps wouldn't get us anywhere.
So...I continued with my thought process, after seeing prgram in a spider crawling up the wall and scrubbing floors (another old post) and then relating to a spider I just went with the whole sauce thing...it couldn't be much weirder than relating to a spider.
My actions of making the dinner are like the steps. I wouldn't mix everything together then throw it in a pot to boil the noodles or I wouldn't stir the raw meat into my sauce without cooking it first. I have an order to how I make this dinner (and well most cooking) and following that order is critical, just like the steps. Can you imagine making ammends for the first time, or anytime for that matter, without doing a 4th step, and then follwing steps in order? I can't.
Okay and now this is when it all came together for me. I make my sauce a little different than most people I don't use a spaghetti sauce, I use a can of tomato soup. (It happened one night when I promised the kids spaghetti and thought I had a can of sauce already, but it was tomato soup. Then came a great invention and now I always use tomato soup and I NEVER liked the premade sauce). I add a little milk and then add my own spices and stuff to the sauce because just the soup is a little bland for my taste.
I add a little cilantro, oregano, parsley flakes, diced tomatoes, mushrooms, olives, and garlic. I also usually throw in a veggie of some sort like zuchinni (oh my that is so yummy) or peas (any way I can get the kids to eat a veggie I am all for). Now see that is what I add to my sauce because that is what works for me and my kidos gobble it up. So this made me think of the tools we pick up in the program. Some work for us and some don't, we take what we like and we leave the rest.
Now I love garlic. I have never ever said the words "too much garlic". I have three young children so I have to tone down my garlic additions so I don't over power the other additions and also it would be too spicy for my kidos. All the spices and additions I add to my sauce are a good balance and one doesn't stand out more than an other. Just like my alanon tools using them helps me balance my program and using one tool more than another I may be missing out on something great or forget about a really important tool if I don't work with all of them as needed. I also need to be careful to attract and not promote my program or push it on someone. I do not want to be so strong that someone walks away from the program because I was too pushy (or using too much garlic for their tastes).
I also season some ground beef or turkey to add to my sauce (cooked of course). Some people could use something else and that is just fine. I don't eat pork so I stick with the same two meats, but I season them to taste like italian sausage with my own seasoning. It covers the ground beef or turkey taste, but compliments the other spices.
Add that whole mixture above to make the spaghetti and then some garlic bread (hehe I typically make a special section just for me so I can have all the garlic I want) and the meal is complete.
Now not everyone who makes a tomtato based form of spaghetti makes it the way I do, but that doesn't mean it isn't spaghetti. We all make it the way we want it. Just like we all work the program a different way. I wouldn't walk up to someone at a meeting and say to them, "How could you not journal, you aren't working a good program if you don't journal". They can journal or they could not it doesn't mean my program is better than theirs, just like using a spice I wouldn't use or not using a spice I would use. Some people would think I use too many spices and some not enough. That is what makes us all different and special in our own way.
So there you have it....my alanon is like spaghetti sauce story. Anyone want some leftover spaghetti?
Yours in recovery, Mandy
-- Edited by Mandy123 on Tuesday 10th of November 2009 01:23:23 AM
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"We are not punished for our unforgiveness, we are punished by it" Jim Stovall
UUUUUMMMMMMMM!! I'd do your spaghetti without the metaphor...anytime and you'd have to work the garlic bread part of your program twice if I were there or then I'd have to bring my own but then you wouldn't get to enable me and have me brag on your cooking huh? LOL I love pasta...just love it and my spouse who has a great kitchen program also did some up last evening and I took all that I liked and what evers left I'll get at later also. Tonight we got a hold of another members kitchen program...Hawaiian...I love Hawaiian food and cook it myself just like you mentioned...as right as I can including growing some of the ingredients.
What an Al-Anon share...I'm sticking with the program although I'm thinking about ordering in some wolf spiders just for perspective...you know.
You got me trippin Mandy...no alcohol or drugs involved! (((((hugs)))))
Can Tomato soup be considered mind and mood altering?
Hi Mandy , that was cute , yep were all different for example Ilove a meeting where someone will start off reading a page from our books and ask every one to share on it , everyone gts something diff from the reading , this truly is a disease of perception One of my biggest examples was a meeting several yrs ago on Detachment there was a new commer * male * . at the end of the meeting we asked if he wanted to speak , he said really glad i came tonite I am going to go home and Kick her out just like u all have said . ??????? We all kinda left shaking out heads wondering where he got that from .
As a sponsor of several people at the moment I do expect them to do what I do Go to meetings . thats it . Louise
for their tastes).
). Some people could use something else and that is just fine. I don't eat pork so I stick with the same two meats, but I season them to taste like italian sausage with my own seasoning. It covers the ground beef or turkey taste, but compliments the other spices. 
