The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
i thought tonights meeting went great, but of course at the end my husband is angry at me for trying to change him, and blah blah blah.
im still going to go every week, i think i just need to be with people who want to be sober too. he got angry because on his birthday he wants to get mess up, its on a saturday and ill be at the meeting.
he said that a girl in the meeting stayed with her husband for 7 years and got beat up and messed up by him, and he doesnt beat me and its only been a month and i want his entire being to change. he asked, 'how it this even going to last?' i replied, 'if you dont know, then i dont know.'
he is angry tonight. picking fights and saying im being sarcastic and how hard i am to talk to. oh well. i cant do anything about how he feels right now. i can concentrate about how i feel. something he hasnt thought of in a long time.
i feel good about the meeting today. the people were amazingly awesome and nice and their stories arent much different from mine. they are older people and they said they are happy to see some young people in there taking control of their lives NOW and not waiting till they are 40 like them. i realized while i sat their supporting my husband who scoffed at any mention of god, that even though i have been clean for a while, it would do me good to learn the 12 steps of recovery for myself. if my husband doesnt want to join me, thats ok. i guess we will slowly grow apart in the months to come and im not ssure what will happen. but at least i know ill be ok.
so wish me luck people! im going to succeed in this life. thanks for listening.
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sticking feathers up your butt doesnt make you a chicken.
i realized while i sat their supporting my husband who scoffed at any mention of god, that even though i have been clean for a while, it would do me good to learn the 12 steps of recovery for myself. if my husband doesnt want to join me, thats ok. i guess we will slowly grow apart in the months to come and im not ssure what will happen. but at least i know ill be ok.
so wish me luck people! im going to succeed in this life. thanks for listening.
Hi Dawn
I am happy you attended your first meeting and am glad you decided that it would be helpful to you to practice the program You are so right and I too know you will be OK.
Just a thought-
I did not feel comfortable sharing at a meeting when my A husband was in the room. We decided to attend different meetings so we could grow in program.
Thanks for including MIP as part of your recovery program. Please keep coming back
Aloha Dawna...good courage...getting to your first meeting. You go for you and that is who we go for. My alcoholic wife once got pissed thinking that I went and talked about her. LOL No one knew who she was and no names were mentioned and she was absolutely safe to keep on keeping on with her anonymity secure.
The alcoholic will squirm and feel insecure and blame and all that normal stuff I would have also how ever if you keep going just for Dawana and the peace of mind and serenity that is waiting for you...listening, learning, focusing and practicing you will achieve life beyond your wildest dreams while he is drinking or not.
They say that whenever you change, the ones closest to you get into "Change back!" behavior mode. "Change back, change back, change back!" I think it's fear. If you're getting healthier, they might have to get healthier. The disease is afraid, they're afraid of the feelings they'd have to go through without the disease. But yay for you! It feels so good to take care of ourselves.
Most A's are going to feel threatened by our getting healthy. They throw fits and scream and yell, blame shift, etc. They act just like the children the disease wants them to be. Just focus on you and let HP worry about him.
Keep coming back.
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~Jen~
"When you come to the edge of all you know you must believe in one of two things... there will be earth on which to stand or you will be given wings." ~Unknown
