The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Self-love is not a dirty word. Loving yourself is not selfish. It is even said that we must "love our neighbor, AS OURSELF" if we can't love ourself then we can't love our neighbor.
I have given this topic much thought lately as I had a talk with my pastor and we discussed self-esteem and self-love. One of the exercises he gave me was to list 5 things about myself that I liked, each day and read them to myself in front of a mirror. This is supposed to "erase" the old negative tapes that play in my head of negative thoughts about myself and replace them with "positive" tapes.
To my surprise I was reading in the Al-anon C2C book on Self-love and found on pg. 183 and found that very suggestion! So here goes:
1. I am intelligent.
2. I love my daughter enough to spend time with her working on her homework.
3. I love my mom enough to take her to her doctor and other medical appointments.
4. I am compassionate.
5. I accept people the way they are.
In the reading on page 183 it suggested that you could list 5 or 10 things about our day that we feel good about before we go to sleep. I had a hard time coming up with just 5, but maybe you can do better! I challenge those of you who read this post to list 5 (or more) things about yourself that you like. This is a good exersize in self-esteem building.
Love and blessings, Overcome
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I can Overcome all things through my HP who strengthens me.
When I went to love myself - a few years ago, I was terrified as I had never done it before. I felt inept, I didnt know how to do it. I worked hard to get me into focus and then I began determing my "true" needs (they were very basic, simplistic). I also set and followed through on boudnaries (b4 hand) and this gave me self esteem, personal integrity/self respect (bc I was being true to me and standing up for myself) and then I acquired feeling of loving detachment which Id never experienced before.
Then when I got to self love, I had to love me like I was a new friend, I really liked and wanted to get to know. I took a percentage of some of the love, I so easily gave to others and applied it and directed it to me. I had to get it down to a fraction of it as it was overwhelming but that little bit of love I gave to me, I felt tangibly and it changed my life radically.
A few years (4) ago, I was so lost, I didnt even know what I liked anymore or who I was, today it is quite a different story.
I did work to replace old tapes with new ones, but it took daily, constant self talk that was over riding the negative self talk already in there. I say, do whatevr works, in the mirror or in repeating it like a mantra.
I love myself and I can say that without feeling awkward or as an ego boost, it simply is. I feel I have more compassion for others. I have self respect and no longer berrate myself or try to get to a false sense of perfection. Today Im grateful for my mistakes bc it shows me one way something didnt work and that is positive & valuable information. I am grateful to be alive (bc I attempted). I appreciate the little things I used to take for granted. I wake up happy now. I dont have to get the last word in, I can actually listen to you and NOT take on your issues & feelings but I can still be compassionate and empathetic. My connection with HP is more positive and fulfilling. I am no longer in emotional pain. I do accept and deal with the reality of right now. And being in now allows me to be open to the unlimited possibilites HP/god has for me and it gives me the opportunity to work towards my goals daily. (Today I actually have goals but I "back burner" them - I look but dont stare).
I think all that shows ways I do love me today, thanks for this post, I could go on lol but I want to get into the mtg this am! TY ((((((((((( OC ))))))))))))))
-- Edited by kitty on Friday 23rd of October 2009 06:48:25 AM
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Light, Love, Peace, Blessings & Healing to Us All. God's Will Be Done. Amen.
