The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Well I found out today that jobs may likely be cut where I work and that has everyone walking around on eggshells, stressing and upset (me included). I am sooo upset that I can't even think straight right now.
I've been there 12 yrs and work my tail off. I'm a single mom and have fought with everything I have to rebuild my life after the end of my marriage to A, relocate and raise my son, on my own, and keep us both out of the system. Money is so tight right now it's not funny and I don't have luxeries. I spend only on neccessities. My only luxery being the net at home and it is dial up-lol! I take care of my mom and help her financially-just paid off her home for her last year and have only been in my new home, 3 yrs now.
I can't even begin to think about what I would do or where I would go if I lost my job. I live in a VERY economically depressed area-a retirement town and the other day when I looked at our local paper there were 3 jobs listed-and those were PT. I would have to relocate and my mother could never do that. I'd have to move my son from his home and his friends and have fought soooo hard all his life to provide him with a stable home.
I am soooo mortified right now and down right scared and I'm sure that we probally won't even be told anything at all until the end of next week. I don't know how to wait that long, under this kind of stress and not know. I know I need to let go and let God, and I am TRYING but I keep pulling it all back and holding onto it like some impending cloud of dome!!!!!!!!!! I HATE not knowing and I HATE living under stress like this. I know it is up to me to turn it around but I need HELP MIP family!!!!
Any ESH is needed and appreciated as always.......
shelly
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Put down the magnifying glass and pick up the mirror!
Right this minute, nothing has happened. There is nothing you can do. You can wait in worry for the next week, or you can stay vry squarely in this moment whre you have a roof over your head and food in the cupboard. Have faith and then more faith. Don't let yourself doubt even during slips.....
I live in an area where the job market has been grim. I have made do with a number of jobs. One thing to remember is t he recession won't always be here. I try to keep to the now.
I also try to work a plan a, b, and c. If you have a back up plan, like a plan be formulated that might help your panic. I can say absolutely I don't like my plan be but I do work it.
Powerlessness sucks!! However we do have a source of Higher Power to rely on if we really want to do that. It's a choice. If I choose my program I am sitting on a conveyor belt in and handbasket watching the flames comes ever nearer. If I am choosing this program as I have been taught I'm working on other things of importance and letting other things I have no control of be worked on by and thru my HP. I stay open to the outcomes and present myself to the process. I am one of those people who always hated change until I learned to accept the first step.
Look down at your feet and ask yourself "Where am I?" then stand still and look straight up and ask, "Where do you want me?" Wait for the answer.
You're really worked up about things that haven't even happened yet. Be working on a plan B. Moving might not be so bad...! Look for jobs in other areas, think about things you can do there to make some extra money. I'm always looking for ways to make some extra cash. I'm starting back to school next weekend to work on my master's degree. The extra money above tuition will be very helpful. Tax time is coming soon if you're a single mom you have that to look forward to. Just try to remember that a current disaster is a future blessing in disguise!
Here's what I do... 1 you'll get unemployment and there is assistance out there food stamps food banks, etc. 2. If you're doing what you're supposed to be doing everything will fall into place for you. Every time I have made a move everything has fallen into place to make it happen. I moved in June and had a TON of friends and a bf who all came together to make everything work out PERFECTLY! Obviously this is where I'm supposed to be... All of those people are gone from my life now. Same thing when I moved from WA to CO and CO to NC. I have no doubt that we are put in places and with people to make something specific happen that we are to learn and grow from. If you do have to move I bet you suddenly find friends that will make it happen or a job that pays to relocate you or something like that. Be open, be thinking in terms of this is what is supposed to happen and if I lose the job it's because I'm supposed to be doing something else or be somewhere else.
You don't want to move, You don't want the hassle, You don't want to change things for your son/mom but what does HP want? Maybe there is something better out there for them and this isn't even about you? Maybe your son is supposed to be somewhere else so something great can happen for him? Who knows? Our entire life is a very long time and only hp knows why things happen the way that they do!! HAVE FAITH! Enjoy the ride, laugh at it when it's crazy, pay attention to your intuition... if you suddenly get the urge to look for jobs in palm beach then look online for jobs in palm beach. Sit still and feel what your insides are telling you. If you get an idea then check into it.
Shell - I don't know how employment law works where you are but surely, after 12 years, you must be due redundancy or severance pay? If so - this money will help while you look for something else, get extra training or do whatever you want to do. Nevertheless as a Trade Union rep myself (in UK) I do appreciate how stressful this situation is for everyone involved. Try to stay strong and positive (not easy I know but we have a saying - "don't let the b*****ds grind you down!" Or at least don't let them see you are down. Hold your head up and try to project a positive image when seeking other employment. You know you are worth it! I know it is an awful time and if I could wave a magic wand and make it OK for you, I would. Just know you are in my thoughts and I am praying it will all turn out right for you. (((((Shell))))))
perhaps AA, maybe Al Anon, but 'As If' comes to mind for me here. I've been an employer for a long time, and tough decisions like this are never fun for anyone. When we've had layoffs and such, sometimes it can be very in the moment, and if people are running about like lunatics, it could have an influence on the decisions - conscious or not.
One way I've learned (or try to learn on going) is to act 'As If'. Perhaps if you act as if you belong, deserve to be there, and are stable, calm, confident, cool and collected...you may end up just all those things
