The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have been talking to my ex A a LOT lately, he is getting ready to move back to this area in a week - we'll see how that goes. He just left a girlfriend who he went to California with and that lasted about two months and she has been sending him nasty messages, etc. He said to me... She needs to do it like you did... LOL
I said... you didn't like it at the time - and he said ya but that was what needed to happen and it was the best thing for me. Speaking of using Alanon and just cutting off all contact with him. I refused to have him back in my life and actually had no communication for a VERY long time. Funny, I never thought he would appreciate it later on at the time. He's doing ok now but I will never believe that he will not use again or remain clean. I can't place that kind of faith in him anymore. I just thought it was funny that he kind of thanked me for what at the time seemed so cruel!
My husband has told me the same after I had detached and got busy. It pretty much left him alone with his disease. The disease doesn't like it at all. Alanon not only works for us, but sometimes for them too, even if they aren't aware at the time.
Christy
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If we think that miracles are normal, we will expect them. And expecting a miracle is the surest way to get one.
I think I'm more concerned about the girl who has to be codependent. Your exA always seems to fall on his feet no matter what happens. I imagine she is devastated that he did not turn out to be what he claimed to be.
