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Post Info TOPIC: Okay! I think I get it now...


~*Service Worker*~

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Okay! I think I get it now...


Spoke to my sponsor last night. She called right when I received a text from my ex that I was contemplating my response to.  We talked about keeping simplicity in and insanity out.  We talked of "Easy Does It".  "Yep", I said, "I got it".  Then we hung up and what did I do?  My"simple" text turned into more of a paragraph which in turn resulted in a back and forth bashing from my ex.... BLECH!  To make matters worse, he was able to work his magic and turn the tables so that I was the bad guy, and I could see an element of truth in what he was saying.  I did end it all with an apology with a twist.

So here I sit, serenity gone, wondering why I didn't listen to my sponsor.  The exact scenario is what she suggested I avoid.  What was that about?  What made me so righteous that I actually thought I could be heard this time?  "Keep it Simple",and  "Let It Begin With Me".  I hope I get it now. 

Blessings,
Lou

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Every new day begins with new possibilities. It's up to us to fill it with the things that move us toward progress and peace.
~ Ronald Reagan~

Sometimes what you want to do has to fail, so you won't
~Marguerite Bro~


~*Service Worker*~

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biggrin  Louise

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I came- I came to-I came to be



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 987
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Hi,
dont beat yourself up their is no point.
I can remember doing this not taking the suggestions of my sponsor on board and then learning the lesson the hard way,
AS LONG AS WE LEARN THE LESSON
when they are drinking we have to take care of us, our sponsors are objective we may let our emtions take over.  Everytime I follow my sponsors suggestions I am working my programme.

HP brought your sponsor to you
Your will wrote the long text
HP's will works best
guess that is the lesson you and I have learnt
hope this hlps
hugs

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~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1990
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LOL I have a way of getting bored and complicating things just to have some stimulation... I am doing this now. It's probably really stupid as it is sneaky and underhanded but I'm hoping it will bring some clarity to me or help me get past my issues without him having to know about it. I think sometimes how my time could be better used... cleaning.... spending time with my kids... hopefully my mind will move my heart and body in the right direction soon.

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~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 1235
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Soooooo glad I am not alone. The ego is cunning, baffling, and powerful.

What helps me a lot... and has been pounded into my head by my sponsor over and over and over again: "nothing pays off like restraint of pen and tongue." Whenever I have to interact with my exAH, (or whenever I am going to be around ANYONE who triggers me,) I pull this line out of my tool box. It's how I prepare and protect myself from reacting. Left on my own, my ego is going to stir up some drama!!  My ego is fed with the (false) power that a good argument brings, it's a power trip. If I don't have restraint, my ego is like a wild bull out the gate.  It's never good.

HP does for me what I cannot do for myself, so I ground myself and welcome HP's presence. I can't go wrong then. Sometimes when my exAH and I are in conversation, I have to pause, and remember my connection to HP.  There is no serenity for me, if I get hooked in a power struggle.  "How important is it?"

-- Edited by glad lee on Thursday 15th of October 2009 08:25:23 AM

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The prayer isn't for Higher Power to change our lives, but rather to change us.



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 13696
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Aloha Lou!!

Maybe this will be just one small piece of change for you....

There is a different outcome between practicing your program and this program.

(((((hugs))))) smile

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~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 2677
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I anticipated a call from my AHsober (gone and wants a divorce). I told myself to be brief. After an hour of my babble, I realized that I had gotten into my disease again with him. Nothing accomplished. At least I am aware of it now.

In support,
Nancy

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