The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I'm new at this and a year and a half into this program.
Here is my question, and I would really appreciate your feedback on this.
I have a sponsor, whom I love and respect dearly. I am currently on my fourth step, (have been for the last 4-5 months at least) I feel the reason why this is taking so long is because she had me answer all the questions in the Blueprint for Progress book. Which is great. I am already done with that. But then she wants me to read every single answer to every single question one by one to her. This seems like it's taking forever, and it is. I can only meet with her every other week for about an hour. So everytime that we get together we get through like 3-4 questions total, after discussing and so forth.
So I need some feedback as to if this is the way this step is done. I know that for AA is completely different and after the person writes their inventory, they do step five in a couple of hours and talking and its done. At this rate im going to finish in 2 years. I still have 90 pages to go.
Please, please please help and let me know how your sponsors took you through this step. or if this is the only way to do it. I am not sure.
There are as many ways to do a 4th step as there are sponsors/members in the program.
The way I did my first formal step was by answering a series of questions (a LOT of questions) given to me by my sponsor. It took me months to do all the writing. I then made an appointment to go over them in my 5th step.
I made a special trip on a weekend and spent a good 8 hours with this person reading over and discussing my inventory.
I use this same method with people that I sponsor.
There is no reason to rush, but I would suggest to you that if you really want to get through it sooner, and personally I think it might help with keeping everything flowing, to arrange a time on a weekend when you can get together together somewhere that you won't be disturbed and go over it.
The 4th/5th steps are vitally important and worth any special effort necessary to get them done.
Thanks for the input, very helpful. I certaintly do not want to rush, but I dont want to spend 2 years if I am already done answering the questions in the book.
I spoke to someone after I posted this that is also in the program and she suggested something similar to what you suggested. She pointed out that I was basically done with the 4th step if I was done with all the questions from Blueprint for Progress. And also that what I am having a hard time is doing my 5th step since there are time constraints and my sponsor has such a busy schedule.
I just want to, like you said, sit down with her one of these weekends and just read my questions however long it takes and thats it. I feel like meeting every other week for 45 minutes to an hour at a time breaks the continuity of the step.
Thanks again for your response, I wil talk to my sponsor about setting time aside with one these weekends and just spending the time to do Step 5 so that we can move on. I want to keep growing.
You have been given great replies so far. I just wanted to add that you have followed your sponsers directions on working on your 4th Step and are simply looking for that other human being to work your 5th Step.
The 5th Step can be worked with any other person you are comfortable with.
It does not have to be your sponser. Many have worked their 5th Step with their minister, counselor or program friend .
