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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> All I did wrong was? to chose someone to marry for all the wrong reasons!
Post Info TOPIC: All I did wrong was? to chose someone to marry for all the wrong reasons!
Katy


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All I did wrong was? to chose someone to marry for all the wrong reasons!
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I married someone that I thought I could fix, I married someone that I thought would work hard at wanting to work hard at buliding a life together, note the (I)!

It was all about what I wanted, what I thought I should have, fast forward 29 years +, It was very selfish of me to think I had that control over another person, to think I knew best, knew what was best for them, jeez and now?


I think I am blessed that the love I give does not need to be enforced by recieving love in return, if I can't give it freely it's not love, I no longer need a barometer to measure the balance of love, and on the days when it isn;t forth coming I love myself enough now for those days not to pull me down, my worth as a person in this life cannot by measured or lived on anyone elses terms but my own, and I must allow those that I love the same privilage, it's not easy I still want to sometimes put my words into somone elses mouth.

Today I say we, note the we! We have built a life together it wasn't how I exspected it to turn out, just shows I know nothing!

We are doing great,

Katy

x


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Katy
hotrod


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Great Share Katy

I can see and hear your great  growth and change in attitude. 

Being able to love others as well as myself without strings and expectations  sums up  alanon recovery  for me.

Thank you for your ESH

Have a Blessed Day

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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud
debilyn


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(o:  Yes! Isn't it great to think of what we do have and being able to not focus on the sad stuff?

I always wanted to marry my AH. When I did, it was wonderful. Of course it went south, but I have no regrets. The memories are very cool.

hugs,debilyn

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maresie


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I don't know that I think I was ever selfish, desperate maybe, out of reality maybe but selfish wasn't in my vocabulary for a long time.  I also think that my desire to control the ex A wasn't so much about my needs (which I could barely acknowledge) I think it was about he was entirely out of control.

Maresie.

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maresie
Mandy123


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Katy,
What a positive share.

Thank you for your ESH and wisdom.

Yours in recovery,
Mandy

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"We are not punished for our unforgiveness, we are punished by it" Jim Stovall

God is seldom early, but he is never late.
Jerry F


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Great share Katy...right on!!  (((((hugs))))) smile

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drucilla06


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Great share Katy.

I agree 100% with giving love without expecting anything in return.

We have to love ourselves and accept the love of our higher power.

Having someone to love you back is icing on the cake.

Dru



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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> All I did wrong was? to chose someone to marry for all the wrong reasons!