The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have many mixed emotions right now. Just letting them be, I am really not trying to figure them out.
I saw my A Hubby for the first time in 3 1/2 weeks since I made him leave. He stopped at my office to pick up mapquest directions to the rehab facility he has finally decided to give a try for the second go round.
I don't have any expectations cause basically I think I have decided to go my own way no matter what. When I asked him to leave it was cause I just had enough. I think I have endured enough to last a lifetime wether he is sober or not.
It was bittersweet cause I think I feel his pain and I am glad he is taking the steps to help himself. It doesn't matter to me that it is now and not when we were together.
I pray for his recover and mine as well. Hopefully he and I can be the best of friends, but I don't think we'll be husband and wife.
I don't have any expectations cause basically I think I have decided to go my own way no matter what. When I asked him to leave it was cause I just had enough. I think I have endured enough to last a lifetime wether he is sober or not.
It was bittersweet cause I think I feel his pain and I am glad he is taking the steps to help himself. It doesn't matter to me that it is now and not when we were together.
Dear Tonya
Bless your heart! I can so relate - If my X AH walked into my life, I would no doubt react the same way! Of course we can have compassion and lift one up in prayer, but that does not mean we want them back- Too many bad memories and too much of the negative! I forgive my XAH, but to reconcile? No! I would be cordial and nice if I were to run into him, but that would be about it- I have forged my own path now! This feeling goes for all the toxic people I had to distance myself from in order to have a more serene life! Hang in there! Its rough at first, but gets better!
__________________
Live and let live and do it with peace and goodwill to all!!!!
Only you know when enough is enough and I can very much relate to this.....also in life never say never because you never know what tomorrow hold for you.
Keep taking care of you sounds like you are working your program....that is wonderful....
I hear a great deal of growth and compassion in your share. You program is strong.
I can remember the first time I could just sit with the mixed bittersweet emotions and not have to change the situation or fix anything. That felt like a miracle and it was It was the beginning of peace and serenity withiin my heart.
Your Doing Great Program work and taking care of you... The fact that you can pray for him and still care, & set your boundry's tells the kind of person you are and your determination... You hang in there, and on tough days make sure you come here... We will be waiting... And on Good Days... We will be waiting as well...
Doing Great Lady... Keep stayin on top... Good to see such growth in you... you inspire many to jump in and do what needs to be done to take care of you...
(((((Tonya))))) You're getting there!! You've arrived at compassion for both of you How Awesome? Might detachment with love also be there? Keep practicing the "Letting go and Letting God" have you both and see how that works out. Good growth. (((((hugs)))))
