The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My mom and dad took in roommates earlier this year. They needed extra money. Of course giving up the Captain Morgans was not an option. They took in a homeless couple they knew nothing about. Fast forward to now. The roommates are crazy and made up a story about my parents to have them arrested.
My mom called me from jail at 9:30 tonight. She said she needed her family which is me and my sister. I said "ok mom I'll pack up the baby and come right over". She said "No, I don't want the baby in the middle of this crap, just call your sister for me".
So I called my sister but she was at a party and had already started drinking so she couldn't drive to see my mom and dad. My parents were in the process of being released when my mom called me.
Now my parents are angry with me and my sister for not being there for them. My dad called and yelled at my sister and implied that she must not love our mother because she wasn't there.
When I called my mom at 11:00 she was home and I could tell she was angry and she said she would never let me go through something like this by myself and then she hung up on me.
Then I pulled out what was left of my eyelashes. I can see very clearly that she is a trigger for my trichotillomania.
Hello star , ever notice that more we try to help others and get involved in things that have nothing to do with us that everyone ends up mad at us ?? go figure . There is nothing for you to handle in this situation , your parents got into this mess all by them selves , you offered to go help , she declined its n ot your fault that your sister was out enjoying herself . i assume u are not attending meetings for yourself ,please find al-anon in your area u need support . this is not about you . Louise
It was not your responsibility to bail your parents out of a situation that they put themselves in. Pulling at the guilt strings of our hearts is a manipulation tactic that our A's use. She's dishing out blame to you - but you don't have to receive it. You can just drop the rope and allow her to sit with her own feelings. I feel very sad that they pulled out the "you must not love us" card. It seems to me that you and your sister both acted responsibility - you did not bring your baby into that environment and your sister did not drink and drive. It's hard to remind ourselves that our A's are sick and in THEIR disease, they justify everything they do and try to blame and point fingers at others because they couldn't possibly take responsibility themselves. You're not alone!
