Finding peace in panic situations - Al-Anon Family Group

Jennifer · ~*Service Worker*~

Finding peace in panic situations

debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

First question, did you mean ESH or ESP?

Good for you for stopping the panic and figuring out how to get passed it. Great move!!

Jen when I completely detached from the disease, the smell or behavior did not bug me anymore. For me it was I loved my A so much and how dare that disease take him from me.

So the smell is no longer associated for me to make me be angry because he is using.

Maybe in your head, you can do the, "stop" when you are feeling that feeling from the scent, and put in something that works for you. Even, "everything is great here!" Changing the negative words in your head might help.

Also maybe think what is the worst that can happen?

I don't like negative stuff, but really what negative thing can happen at work thing where they drink? If they are all drinking, you will be the smartest, quickest, most attractive person there!! Hugs,debilyn

serendipity · ~*Service Worker*~

I think that you found something that worked for you Jennifer!!

Maybe it is the moon, or time of year, or this program but I have recently become aware of how in tune with other people's emotions I am. And how easily I am triggered into feelings and thoughts. The thing that has been helping me is to recognize and identify. If it is not mine, I let it go and look to see what it is I am really feeling.

I am sensitive to other people's emotions even when they are not sharing them with me. I sense it. But I no longer have to react to it. I am no longer so codependent that I have to sense what they are feeling and then try to fix it. I am dependent enough to let them fix themselves or wait for them to tell me outright what they want. Progress.

I also found that when I was a child I had severe panic attacks and it was directly related to my feeling trapped, like in school. Now that I am a grown up, I always have my car so I can get away, I never have to be trapped again! But when I was a kid, I had to stare at one thing, focus all my attention on it (had to be something blue) and i would exclude all other noise, people, movement and I would focus for 5 to 10 minutes, till I could calm myself down

You go girl. It sounds like scarey stuff but you are dealing with it. let go and let God!!

kitty · ~*Service Worker*~

I am very very aware of other people's feelings. I always have had that ability, if I am close to them physically - say within 4 feet - it is very easy to know what they are experiencing. I used to think those feelings were coming from me, as a teen I realized, I was empathically picking up from them.

Right after I set & followed through on some of my personal boundaires, i had to work on my inner boundaries. The feeling that I am not ok, just b/c someone I care about is having a issue/crisis. I dont ahve to take that chaos trip with them of emotional roller coastering. I can be "OK" even when the people I am around are not. This took some practsie but once I decided I would "be OK" it got easier to do with practise. I also remember to focus on me first -- check my feelings b4 I go to a party or gathering.

There are also some simple excersizes u can do ahead of time & say during an event. Imagine a white light in ur heart or core inside of you. Focus on that white pure light energy. Allow it to grow until it is encompassing you and is bigger than you are. Imagine u are inside of an "egg" of white light. This is an excersize & form of spiritual/psychic protection and it does work. If u are good at visualizing colors, use blue, it serves to protect but white light contains all energies & it believed to be the most powerful. I use a lot of color when I meditate & can visualize color easily. (If u want to talk further, we can do so in private messages about it or some of the other resources/books Ive used for this).

Aside from self protection, acceptance & surrendering & rememmbering my own powerlessness over others - helps me too - I can change me but not them.

Being aware of my feelings, taking in some deep breaths, allows me to calm down. I used to have a lot of anxiety too. Now when I feel it, the faster I can recognise my feelings & validate them, lots of times when I felt anxiety, it was simply bc I was doing something new & different for me. New is always a lil scary/exciting. That helped me too, just validating my feelings.

Jerry F · ~*Service Worker*~

Good post and work Jen!! You'll probably find that the work has to stay active
in order to keep the panic attacks away. Mine has resulted in vision loss, ringing
(tension)ears and chest pains too. Started way back and then the program and
its people and power to heal came into my life.   I learned from investigation that
mostly I was from a young age up until now, fear based. The consequence of
uncontrolled fear is tension and panic attacks and the physical consequences are
frightful also. Just imagine sitting at work doing what is necessary including
paper work and going from clear vision to tunnel vision to total blindness in the
matter of several minutes...YAHOO!! only one thing to do...let go of everything
including the panic desire to get my vision back and my need to tell other coworkers
that I was visionless and sit back and let go of everything but my breathing and
new meditation.   Learning a new definition of FEAR in Al-Anon worked so very
well also...a new mind set...It is defined in the acronym FEAR   (F)alse (E)vidence
(A)ppearing (R)eal...My mind, body, spirit and emotions were reacting for a false
reason.   Often when I just reacted to things my fearful personality would turn
it into something totally different and illogical and make it something I could not
escape from.   My mind...I've never been able to trade it in for something better
and if I put my brain up for sale I'd bet big bucks because it's never been used
for the right thing.

Psycho-somatic is the clue for me...how my soma (body/physical) reacts to my
Psyche or (mental) perceptions.

I have to use, like yourself in the grocery line, active counter responses that
don't include tensioning. Doing the opposite of what my body is trying to do
is also terrific for me. If my chest is cramping...I totally relax, every cell in my
body, tell them theres nothing to be concerned about and to relax and "we will
wait it out until relaxation comes."   That doesn't take very long for me today
and there is nothing I'm able to do anyway...It is totally debilitating but not a
heart attack cause my heart is beating just fine and regular and my breathing is
normal but...

I was told in 1984 that I was loosing my neurological system which includes my
hearing and vision. I am double bionic in my ears but my therapy work is
reversing that. I've got one good eye and that is also getting sharper with
help (home therapy) and I can lower my normal heartbeat and temperature
in meditation.   Everyone can do self healing with acceptance and practice and
faith; everybody.

I'm proud of your courage to change it...You go Jennifer!!   (((((hugs))))) smile

Jennifer · ~*Service Worker*~

Thank you all for sharing!

Deb, I did mean ESP; not in the look into a crystal ball sense but in the sense that my hearing and smell and now sense of people around me is changing as my vision changes and I adapt to it. I really like the reminder about being the smartest, quickest person LOL Maybe if I start doing some beer battered fish fry here at home I will not mind those smells as much!

Serendipity, Thanks it's nice to know other's have been in similar places as i am. Your post reminded me to carry a rock I know we are supposed to be putting down our rocks here but this is a little different like you staring something blue when i was a child I held a rock in my hand. A touchstone I guess that gave me the same way of calming myself; anyway I still have it and now it is in my pocket the last few days. When i get panicked I rub it.

Kitty, Thank you. I needed a good reminder to get back to meditating and doing the light visuals. I always called it my protective bubble, there was a time I had that feeling aroundme always. It's a good goal to get back to. I'd love to know a few more good referrals on books for this when you have the time to PM them, I may even still have or remember a few I enjoyed enough to reccomend too.

Jerry, Oh boy can I imagine the scenario of sitting at work and suddenly not being able to see. When my condition started I would wake up in the morning with no vision in one or both eyes every few months. It would come back over a few weeks but those first few days were really rough. I love being able to put a name to what i need to do "active counter responces" why that makes me feel better to know what i need to do I have no clue but I like the name LOL Thank you too for the reminder of self healing, along the lines of what Kitty was saying too, I need to practice my meditation and self energy skills. By the way i would never refuse anyone using my prayer, funny the more i use it the better condition it gets, no fear of it wearing out

Jen

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.