Monday started out like any other day.Other than the fact that after being off the weekend I wasn't really ready to go back to work,I was ok.Or so I thought.
I am the closer ( I work in retail) and that is because I asked for that shift.I am not a morning person.So usually when I get there on Monday there is alot to do.It's a very busy day.However this Monday there was more than the usual to be done.I was feeling a little overwhelmed,I do that to myself and stress myself,but I thought I was handling it ok.
On top of my usual work load, and the added work load, I ended up having to cover a department that is next to mine.This happens alot,we are 'sister' depts,we cover eachother's lunches,breaks,etc.I HATE covering that dept.I love my job,my dept,I enjoy working there.I just HATE that other dept.There are 3 full timers and a part timer.ONE of the full timers in that dept does ALL the work.I am not kidding,the others are lazy and look for every excuse they can find to get off the salesfloor or sit on their butts and do nothing.It doesn't affect me unless I get stuck covering for them.
The thing is I have been handling the situation pretty well until yesterday.
I was able to do what I can and tell myself I am paid well for my time,I know I am appreciated,just do the best I can and go.
Well Monday it all blew up.A  senior manager called and asked me to do something and I told him the workload I had plus I was covering the other dept because the guy working last night left for a doctor's appt,and the other guy went to lunch.(dinner actually)I asked if he could get someone else,he said there was no one else.He said the store manager had told him to call me.I said "Well,if YOU don't care,and HE doesn't care then I don't care" and I hung up.I went to the bathroom because I felt I was going to cry.I wanted so badly to just walk out.I asked HP to help me,I had to go back out there and do what he asked and I couldn't go out there crying.I didn't understand what was wrong with me,this was unusual for me.
I had already vented to several people about my work load and stress.....
I managed to get thru the day,a couple people asked me if I felt better and I said yes but I am still not happy.I wasn't friendly.
Well, I said all that to say this.
I cut contact with my crazy alcoholic sisters about a year ago.I have been so much more peaceful and happy actually enjoying my life since then.Even tho I am married to a recovering alcoholic,I have even managed to get along quite well with him.
I told him he was the only alcoholic I was going to allow in my life from now on.
Like I have  a CHOICE???
About 6 months ago they hired a man in my dept who is an alcoholic.Sometimes he comes in with the smell of whiskey on his breath.He has been talked to and he is trying to control it i guess.I had to wonder why God sent him to work in MY store,in MY dept?! In the dept that I sometimes cover,there is another A,and a recovering sex addict.
I work closely with these people.
My family situation,which I thought I had shielded myself from,broken away from,has been recreated at my job!I am working with addicts and it is affecting me again.
When I got home last night I unloaded on my AH and he is the one who made me realize I need my program again.I have been letting it slide,no meetings,no reading,no steps,because I thought I had it under control.Only one A and I could handle that.What was wrong with me yesterday was codependent crazies.
So I am going back to meetings and I will work the steps again.I am also going to minimize contact with the addicts...I have learned my lesson.I will need ALanon the rest of my life.

Thanks for reading my long saga.
I'd appreciate any thoughts,experience,strength,and hope?

Dru