The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My three sons are here with me for a few days. No spouses, no grandchildren. This is rare. So I see it as my opportunity to talk to them. I feel that when their dad left four years ago that he blamed it all on me. Time to straighten things out. And in alcoholism sometimes we don't talk about the obvious. Well, I knew that it would be hard to start a conversation because they are young men.
We started talking. I told them that I had set my goal to stay in my house (rental) for five years after the youngest graduated. I wanted them to be able to come to their childhood home to see old friends, bring their new friends home to see where they grew up. Their cousins are closeby. It is in a rural area and they live in cities. It has worked out well. I told them that I have a year to go and it was time for me to move on. Afterall, their dad is buying a house just for him. Afterall, he still wants a divorce and just left me high and dry. Afterall, I am home alone and have no help and have to make a fire by myself every day. Afterall, I don't have a social life here. I said that the disease of alcoholism has an impact on all of us. Afterall, your father is a recovering alcoholic.
My oldest said I am in the same place as you because my wife wants a divorce. My second said that he would help me buy a house. My youngest said quit blaming everything on alcoholism. If you are not happy then go find something that makes you happy. Thanks sons. I am glad that we had this talk.
Shortly afterwards, I received a huge truckload of wood. A relative owed me a favor and this is how he paid me back. OMG. I remember four years ago how I was so worried about how I was going to survive without my AHSober. I had no clue. And here I am being a victim and all and surviving. I must have progressed a little in my recovery program. Thank you HP and you Alanoners for listening and supporting me.
Wow, talk about support & understanding at home ~ u did well raising your sons. That is obvious in their responses. So glad ur here, working it! Nice progress.
__________________
Light, Love, Peace, Blessings & Healing to Us All. God's Will Be Done. Amen.