The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hello, I am new here...been looking for love in all the wrong places! I have read alot of the message trails here...and immediately found comfort...Thank you! I am going through a relationship breakup right now...one that I Knew in my soul I should not have entered...two years ago! And in the beginning I put up all of the good displays of affection, sincerity, hope...but really the underlying feelings were fear, untrusting, disrespect ...hardly a truth to any of it. We each had an agenda...and when those agendas did not manifest...the barbed words flew like arrows...and now two years later...I am in complicated grief...knowing I should never have come on this journey, wondering why I put myself through another obvious obstacle course...and in a convoluted eruption of sadness mixed with anger mixed with guilt...and somehow I know it is all related to the neglected and abusive childhood i have had...picking a man who fits the perfect abandonment expertise...and not wanting to let go of a relationship that is a facade and has really been so manipulative and conditional...it makes me sick! Thanks for listening...I look forward to connecting here...gleaning some understanding...it is all tooooo heavy for me right now!
It sounds as if you have quite a bit of insight into what has been going on with you. If you keep coming, posting, and get into the program and work it, you will have lots of realizations and make very good progress.
You will be urged to go to meetings, work the steps, get a sponsor. And there are meetings and chats here. Face to face meetings are highly recommended.
Blessings, Temple
__________________
It's easy to be graceful until someone steals your cornbread. --Gray Charles
Thank you Temple~ I appreciate your view. I look forward to this unravelling...I know it has strangled me for far too long! I am headed to my first al anon meeting tomorrow...I feel so many things...mostly sadness, great disappointment, overwhelm...and somehow relieved to have finally found that I am indeed a product of my upbringing...and that the sabre tooth tigers who raised me will not hurt me any more if I can learn to love myself ...and protect myself ...from my vertigo past. One day at a time.
Welcome and your in the right place . hope to meet u soon in chat . Find meetings and discover the YOU u were meant to be . Find out what makes u tick why you do what u do ,when u live with alcoholism thinking becomes distorted and we just don't make good decissions for ourselves , that will change as u begin to find yourself in our program . Louise
