The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I desperately need some time to myself - ALONE lol... Completely alone....
My abf went to work today for a day shift.... But it's summer and my son has been with me every moment, since I am not working atm....
I love my son, but I just need some time ALONE sometimes....and I haven't been getting any unless I leave the house but even then it isn't quite the same as I sure you know...just been craving some peaceful time by myself, and not out in public...
Well today, my son said he wanted to visit my abf's mom, there are some kids over there he likes to play with sometimes, and recently she offered to watch him for me sometimes if I needed it, so I called and asked if she wouldn't mind my son coming over for a bit, and if I could just have some time to relax...she didn't mind at all...
So good, so I bring him over there, and go home to chill, knowing I will have 1-2 hours...
Not 20 mins later, my abf calls from work, says come pick him up, there is absolutely nothing else for him to do there today.....
On the bright side, however, even tho I am feeling very irritated inside - I can say this: I did get a LITTLE bit of time.... Plus I told him that I was trying to get some time to myself, that I had dropped off my son at his mom's, and now 20 mins later he was calling me to pick him up (and I said it CALMLY lol) He actually was a bit nice to me and said that instead of leaving right now I can take 30 more mins and then leave to pick him up...I guess he will find something to do in the meantime. That was very nice. I am still irritated because I thought I was going to have closer to 2 hours than 1 but.....at least I got something...and he actually showed a little niceness....AND I didn't yell or cry about it....
I can soo relate to needing alone time. I have 2 kids so it does get hard. Really the only alone time I get is at night when they are sleeping. But if I chose to do this I have to suffer the consequences of being tired in the morning; sometimes it's worth it!
__________________
"Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip." Will Rogers
I live around people who have no concept at all of giving anyone space. Could your A not have got a ride from someone else. I spent 7 plus years in a relationship that mirrored total dependency. I was totally dependent on him and he was on me. I think now that was toxic. If I wasn't with him I was thinking about him.
That would have been nice but no - he couldn't have as far as I know... I constantly have to drive him around, he does not have a car, we basically share...altho, not really, because he has no license so he can't just take my car when I'm not using it......my time alone is really limited right now. But it worked out ok I guess. Still could use a vacation of one lol.
I shared a car/truck with the ex A. I found it incredibly difficult but I think he made it an absolute chaotic experience. I hope you find some time to yourself.
