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Is there anything that can make a person's breath smell like alcohol for hours at a time if the person has not been drinking?
Am I being lied to? My fiance is attempting to get sober. He told me he hasn't had any alcohol for weeks. His breath smelled like alcohol all evening. He swore up and down that he did not drink, but he cannot explain the smell on his breath. What in the world could it possibly be? I know that I am not imagining the smell.
I agree with Debilyn and i will add something; i am an A, so i kinda understand what we have in mind and why we do this :) Just next time tell him that u need a proof; he will ask what proof? Tell him i need u to take an Alcohol test. Beleive me he will agree but this test will never take place. So u just stick to ur openion and make it the matter that will stand between u & him. It is like u put him under pressure so he will crack sooner or later and confess. His reactions will be: 1. He will just turn the table and walk away: Baby, i cannot beleive u do not trust me!! 2. Anger: What do u want from me? 3. Escape as usual 4. Ok lets go make this test; just to end the conversation hopping that you will let it go. Try it!!
Learn to trust your gut , trust what u see and hear and smell . nobodycan make u crazier than an alcoholic lying about drinking when everything in you is screaming YESSSSSS. alcoholics lie its what they do . Louise
If he has been drinking, it will show in time with real proof that wont have any doubt. My Abf did the same thing,and ya know when i confronted the issue he blamed me for not being supportive, hypersensitive and told me i was crazy. I left the conversation feeling guilty, sad and like i was making his program harder for him. Two weeks later he was in ER, almost dead from drinking and then he admitted i was right but he was tired of disapointing me so he didnt want to admit it, thought he could stop on his own....
Remember, you matter! Dont give him the opportunity to make you the bad guy! If he is drinking again, it will show....
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What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself. Hecato, Greek philosopher
It's hard for me to tell if my AH has been drinking or not sometimes. I'm starting to learn the behaviors, though. He's not one of those fall-down, slurring drunks. Most of the times, it's a couple of beers and that's sometimes not enough for me to see that he's been drinking versus if he's had more than a couple.
In any case, when I find my brain going "has he been drinking? how much has he been drinking?" I have to ask myself... "er, so what's knowing gonna do for me?"
I'm not my AH's personal watchdog. Even if he were in recovery, it's still not MY dilemma.
Alcoholics have a physical allergy to alcohol. It creates a very physical need in the body to provide it with more and more. Anyone with this physical allergy who is attempting to stop has their body screaming at them for more alcohol. Quitting is a monumental task - this I've learned from friends I've made in AA.
If the person's trying to quit on their own, they have a very long uphill battle. I won't say it isn't possible, but it's very apparent to me that if someone chooses to sober up with HELP, like through AA, they do a lot better because they have a HUGE network of support - and they get to learn the spiritual side of it all. They learn to replace the alcohol with their Higher Power.
In any case, learn what you can about the disease of alcoholism. Get to some open AA meetings, too, so you can listen to what it's like for the alcoholics in coping with this disease.
Most importantly, get to some face-to-face Al-Anon meetings. The love and support you receive there will help you restore your sanity and take the focus of your life back to what's important... you.
Think about the Three C's... you didn't cause it, you can't control it, and you definitely can't cure it.
I'm very sensitive about being lied to at this point in my marriage. It's gotten to it's worst point and I need to VERIFY if I really feel there might be a lie.
I can say TWICE I accused my husband of doing something and he didn't do it. I had to verify, but then after I got the proof, I felt 100% better.
Be prepared for the flip side though. I like the idea of the alcohol test. The problem is, at that point, what will you do? If he shows he's been drinking, then what?
I agree with what everyone said. If he is drinking, it will show in due time, and maybe you need that time to get your ducks in a row.
My husband is drinking O'Doules and sneaks that, so I really need to prepare myself even though I haven't yet.
I used to totally obsess about when the ex A used drugs. He hid it very very well for a long long time. I also was in complete denial.
I know for me personally it did no good to try to police him. I know the feeling well and I also know now I was always powerless. I highly recommend getting a copy of Getting them Sober.
