The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today I felt more in control of my life than I have in years. I thank God for this day. I thank Him for allowing me and trusting me with three beautiful girls he sent for me to love ( my daughters). I thank Him for their laughs and smiles. I even thank Him for giving me the wisdom and courage to discipline them for not cleaning their rooms like I had asked. Before today, I would have worried about my AH not agreeing with me they needed consequenses for not minding me. I did not give in today, I stood up for what I think is right. I am thankful that today is meant for TODAY and not for tomorrow and that I KNOW the difference. I am thankful I did not allow my feelings to get hurt today when for the first time in weeks my mom actually got out of her house even though it wasn't to see her grandkids, instead she was going gambling with a friend. I am thankful I did not get saddened by my mom being high on pain pills today. I am also thankful that I did not look at my husband with bitterness in my heart tonight, instead I felt empathy towards him. I'm grateful I did not count the beers left in the cooler this morning so I would know how many he actually drank last night. I'm so very thankful to finally realize it's ok to admit I don't want to try and fix anyone. It's ok to work on me, and focus on finding me again. I don't hate myself anymore for the choices I made and for the way I let my AH rule over me. I am thankful I had the courage to talk to my oldest daughter (12) this morning about her dad's drinking, and that he is a good man with a bad problem., and no, it's not normal to drink so much at night. I am thankful that when I told her he loves her I knew I was speaking the truth and that she knew it too. I defintiley thank God that my kids know they are loved, by both of us. I truly am grateful for my life, today I felt our Heavenly Father working within me to heal my heart and restore my soul. I learned that setting invisible boundaries to the A isn't me being selfish, it's actually loving myself and in a strange sort of way showing love to the A. I'm thankful that I "think" I'm actually starting to get "it".
Wow (((((((((((((beechmom)))))))))))) only days ago you talked about your situation in a very different manner.
And may I remind you of what I said and meant: NOTHING CHANGES UNTIL SOMETHING CHANGES.
What changes you have made.
AMAZING. And the changes you have made that have brought about your gratitude are positive dynamite. They blow me away. You have changed you. You have changed your thinking. You have changed your attitude and acknowledged your self worth by these changes.
I give thanks to God for this day, for this miracle, for the changes I hear you are working on.
ONE DAY AT A TIME. And, when you awake unsure, think back to THIS MOMENT in time and hold on to it and know that you can restore yourself to this moment in time and bring back this surety.
Keep on doing what you are doing today and you will be fine, beechmom.
What joy you have given to me in my heart this morning. I give heartfelt thanks. Suzannah
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Out of the ruin of my past I have found the fortress of myself and I know how to defend it.
Strive for WISDOM; Seek SERENITY; NEVER compromise your INTEGRITY.
Yes, what a powerful post, wow. Talking to daughter - excellent, I'm so happy for your growth thus far. And u are absolutely right... setting boundaries is about loving us but also loving them. When we respect ourselves more, we respect others more too. Way to dive in!
I have learned that being grateful for every little thing has enabled me to have so much gratitude in general - I am getting more positive all the time & I appreciate it & know it's value. Being negative is such a sucky drain. Good for you! Focus on you & love those changes, you're worth it!
-- Edited by kitty on Friday 26th of June 2009 06:37:08 AM
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Light, Love, Peace, Blessings & Healing to Us All. God's Will Be Done. Amen.
thank you both for those words of kindness. Suzannah and Kitty~ the calmness in my heart was amazing yesterday and I pray that it continues today. I know for sure the calmness came from above; my heart always lets me know when He's working inside of me. I feel different now. I've removed myself from being a victim; seeing myself as that only made me tired, unable to fully funtion. Basically, for the first time in a very long time, I am just simply grateful for the present and choose to live in the moment. I cannot thank you all here enough for the wisdom and encouragement I have learned so far. Talk about WOW! I have alot to learn I know, but it's exciting to feel the changes and witness my AH change as I change. I love what you said Suzannah- NOTHING CHANGES UNTIL SOMETHING CHANGES. That speaks volumes to me. I pray that ya'll have a great, productive day and thank you.
