My ex-husband made some very poor choices when we were going through our divorce in 2004. It caused him to have to see his only daughter under only supervised visitation conditions ever since.

My ex-husband is the ACOA father, who physically, mentally, verbably, spiritually and sexually abused him as a child. The sexual abuse lasted from the time he was 4 until he was 11. Now because of this abuse, my ex-husband has chosen to turn to viewing child porn himself. It is a horrible dysfunction/ illness and one that I have to protect my daughter from.

But on this, Father's Day, I am wishing things could be different. But if wishes were rainbows we all would have colorful days. I guess it just wasn't in the cards for my daughter to have a normal childhood like some kids have. But I know she is not the only one. I am grieving for her today. She seems to be taking it in stride, as most 12 year olds do. She is planning her 12th birthday party on Tues. and that's formost in her mind right now.

She made her father a Build a Bear that says "World's Greatest Dad" on it's t-shirt. I have to shudder at the thought. But that's how she sees him. How sad. She also wants to stop this morning and get a Happy Father's day cake for him. She tries so hard to please.

The visitation is from 10 a.m. till noon Cenral time. It is in a town that is a 30 minute drive from here, so I have to find something to do to occupy myself during that time.
Maybe I will go to a church service. Maybe I will go for a walk along the Missouri River and commune with my God. I haven't decided yet which it will be.

Keep me and daughter in your prayers at this time.

Thanks for reading this post.

Overcome (formerly Java)