The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Davids mowing post has triggered me to write this, as I have been really struggling this past few weeks, and wondering why after nearly three years of my husbands sobriety I seem to have hit a really down time, I thought I was never going to feel this way again, and I think it's when I fall back into old habits, it's when I am not around programme people that live eat and breath the steps, I have gone from feeling despairingly sad today to just overwhealming gratitude, I think the crazies for me are when I slip back into old habits and want the alanon outcome my way, it doesn't work, but still every now and then I go back and give it another try, I guess it makes me feel so sick and tired, because it wants me to leave it be, I hope I can.
You had a slip in program but u absolutely know what to do & I'll validate it, get back to meetings, steps, program tools - whatever they are & they work for you. I have to constantly remember to surrender to the fact that I am helpless & powerless to influence or change anyone but *me* and that is my only real job in life, is to work on me, tend to my own needs.
I think for a lot of us living with an A, if they have a good program, we may slip & rest in the fact that they are doing what they need to & we dont have to do any foot work but it's just not true. I realized that (for me) the lights were on but no one was home -- now I dont expect others to tend my garden, I get out there in the mud & weeds & do the work for me & on me. Getting needs met by other people is never very fulfilling/sustaining and today I get that stuff from within & it actually means something. B/c I get it from within, I'm not looking at to others to fill me up.
I also had to face the fact that I needed al-anon daily & without it I can revert pretty quickly. It works when u work it! Focus on YOU & the gratitude - what we focus on grows.
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Light, Love, Peace, Blessings & Healing to Us All. God's Will Be Done. Amen.
Davids mowing post has triggered me to write this, as I have been really struggling this past few weeks, and wondering why after nearly three years of my husbands sobriety I seem to have hit a really down time, I thought I was never going to feel this way again, and I think it's when I fall back into old habits, it's when I am not around programme people that live eat and breath the steps, I have gone from feeling despairingly sad today to just overwhealming gratitude, I think the crazies for me are when I slip back into old habits and want the alanon outcome my way, it doesn't work, but still every now and then I go back and give it another try, I guess it makes me feel so sick and tired, because it wants me to leave it be, I hope I can.
regards
Katy
x
GREAT work....SEEING it and ACCEPTING it is the hardest hurdle...and you did it...yea, when i "stray" from my recovery mates??? I get the ole crazies.....OLD patterns glom on to me and I gotta work my prog. to shut them down......this is a maintenance type thing....we gotta be vigilent.....it does not matter if i am here 1 year or 20.....its been 5-1/2 and i am here for life....i gotta be if i want good mental health.......GREAT work......patting you on the back......
