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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Normal?? which normal?
Post Info TOPIC: Normal?? which normal?
Jen


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Normal?? which normal?
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I haven't been here much lately, just popped in once in awhile, but tonight I went to a meeting and it was a good one.  Winter has been kind of tough on our little meeting in our little town. Tough like sitting at the meeting room hoping someone will come a few times. Only had once or twice when someone didn't but you all get my meaning.

Anyway, I felt the need to share something that came up at tonights meeting.

I grew up in this disease. I grew up with codependency as a youngster and lived with an alcoholics from preteen on into adulthood. I did not grow up being taught to react to situations the way non alcoholic affected people do. I do not react to even normal situations the way normal people do. Normal for me is to forget to take better care of myself, get overtired, don't eat right, forget to do my meditations, or whatever and then focus on someone else because it takes the focus off of me and lets me forget my own stresses for the moment. It is not a better way to deal with things as we all know, but it is the comfortable way, the familiar way.

So when I catch myself, when I realise that this pattern has prevailed yet again in my life, I need to go back to step one. I have no power over alcoholism. Sometimes I don't even have power over my own self and my automatic reactions that have been hardwired into my being by growing up with this disease. Admitting my own powerlessness is where I start, yet again, the road to sanity.

I know that a power greater than me will restore me to sanity. Many times HP and I have been down this path. I have only to get out of the way and I will be directed onto the path of sanity once again. I will stray aain. I cannot help myself. It is part of who I am, but HP will bring me back every time as soon as I let it happen.

I just wanted to share this. It was not really a new revelation, but touched me in a new and different way tonight.

Love to you all in recovery,

Jen

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~Jen~

"When you come to the edge of all you know you must believe in one of two things... there will be earth on which to stand or you will be given wings." ~Unknown
debilyn


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Hi Jen, this was a good share. I liked all the realizations you described.

thank you, love,debilyn

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Mariner


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Hi (((Jen)))

Thanks for your share.

I too grew up in this disease and have lived most of my life not knowing what normal is, Some say its a setting on the washing machine smile

I am learning to be aware of my behaviour, through this awareness I am getting healthier. I constantly need to work step 1-3 relying on my HP to restore me to sanity. My codependancy is such a large part of me I have to work really hard at breaking free. One day at a time....

With Gratitude Carol



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rosielightshines


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"I have only to get out of the way and I will be directed onto the path of sanity once again. I will stray aain. I cannot help myself. It is part of who I am, but HP will bring me back every time as soon as I let it happen."




ROSIE___YEP...sounds like me...."having to get out of my own way".....your normal sounded just like mine.....I did not know what was normal was....still not sure, LOL, I wonder if there IS such a thing...If it is balance...peace....feeling good about who I am , trusting in my god and myself, knowing that there is higher help for me, accepting me, good and bad and still loving me inspite of my self awareness of my assets and liabilities, then I am "reaching normal"......

I think those of us that are in recovery are probably the most "normal" when it comes to the whole population...Many people are "out there" and sicker than hell and do not even know it....At least WE are here...WE are aware we need help...WE are reaching out for that help....I would say that is a very "normal/healthy" way of thought....

just my take

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Rosie in recovery one day at a time
Jean4444


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good to see you on here, Jen, been missing you. great share- like the depth of your insights as always. hugs, J.

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maresie


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I certainly grew up in a codependent, enmeshed dysfunctional family.  I don't know that normal is exactly healthy either. Few people if any are exactly mentally healthy in this world.  I think that's one reason it is such an effort to be one of them.

Maresie.

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maresie
Jen


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I think that I agree that normal in general is a setting on the washing machine. Most people that I know are not particularly emotionally healthy.

I am just glad that MY normal has become working my program daily, getting to know myself, being aware of my shortcomings and my strengths, acknowledging my blessings, and attempting to stay in touch with my HP. All this is a bit of work on a daily basis, but is becoming a routine that I can count on to bring me through anything that comes my way. I am thankful for that, and all of the wonderful people in this program, newcomer and oldtimer alike.

In recovery,

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~Jen~

"When you come to the edge of all you know you must believe in one of two things... there will be earth on which to stand or you will be given wings." ~Unknown
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