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Update on my situation with dry drunk husband...I told him Sunday that I was going to file Monday and he didn't seem to be too upset. He immediately started asking for things that were bought for the house with my mom's money that he considered to be his. He also has a Kawaski Mule that was bought for the farm that we lived on and sold in November and he wanted me to sign a paper that stated that it was payment for his work on the farm! He doesn't want much. lol
I called the lawyer today to find out what I would need to gather together for an uncontested divorce, if I can get away with that. I don't know what to do with the situation because my name is on some of my mom's stuff and I don't want him getting to it. He has already mentioned that I will have to put down the checking account and money market account that are really my mother's, but my name is on them, to pay her bills.
I suspect that I'm going to have to take my name off of the accounts and have mom sign for her bills for awhile. She is 86 and hasn't been taking care of the bills, I have, so I will have to help her. This is so frustrating! I just want it to be over and to be free of him. His true colors are starting to show, he was only after the money all this time!
I wouldnt worry too much about moms accounts , it is her stuff and your her guardian of sorts makes sence to have u on accounts . has nothing to with your husb none of it should be available to him . check with lawyer to make sure of course but am sure your ok . I was on my moms accts too just in case .
I just did this too. It took me 30 years to do it. Per my counsler she told me how to do the leagel seporation. So I'm thinking of that just to get him out of the house for my own peace of mind. Good luck just take it one day at a time.
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I put my hand in yours and together we can do what we could not do alone.
A piece of advice I got when I was going through my divorce that served me very well when it came to dividing up "the stuff" was to treat it like a business deal. Try to keep emotions out of it (and yeah that is hard! ...at least it was for me).
Try to get yourself the best deal you can but don't sweat the small stuff. I watched another friend's divorce get to the level of having to go thru lawyers to decide who was gonna get pots and pans. I thought that was ridiculous at the time. When my divorce came up and the ex was standing in the kitchen saying she was taking the set of Revere ware because her sister gave it to her... I told her "no she gave it to US as a wedding present". Then I remembered the other friend and how silly I had thought it was to argue over pots and pans, took a breath and told her, "But you are more than welcome to take them".
Anyway, choose your battles. And I agree, that your mom's assets have nothing to do with him, whether your name is on the accounts or not.
...at least it was for me).
