So last night my husband was at his AA meeting and I was getting my son ready for bed.  We climbed into his bed to read stories and I suddenly felt winded.  Of course that brought on some panic because I couldn't figure out why I should be winded.  I worked through it as best I could with deep breaths and I asked my Higher Power to give me strength.  I also knew that my husband would behome soon enough (he's the person who helps calm me down when I get anxiety and/or panic).

So once I go tmy son to bed, I called my husband to see if he could stop by the store to pick up some swim diapers on his way home.  He sounded totally drunk and was saying that he was confused.  Of course I told him to come straight home and my anxiety got even worse.  How could he help calm me down in his condition?

So when he got home I could tell he was very drunk - he said that he didn't go to his meeting and that he couldn't understand why he was feeling like that.  We went outside to have a calm conversation - I thought I could try to help him figure out what he did while he was gone for 3 hours.  I told him that I wasn't mad at him, I just wanted to help.  So he said that he went to Bass Pro Shop to look for ammo for his gun (I knew he was going to do that before his meeting).  Then he said he went to a restaurant near the shop for dinner.  He said that he only had one beer and few sips of a second one when he started feeling "strange."  Then he said that he asked the waitress to take the beer away and bring him water.  So I'm not quite sure whether to believe him or not, but that's not really the point, right?

The funny thing is that here I was asking my HP for strength to deal with my panic/anxiety and he sends me a drunken husband.  After talking with my HP for a while I finally realized that maybe the strength he was sending me was the strength of being able to take care of myself and not count on my husband.  I had to laugh at the whole thing.