The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I wrote my shrink and TOLD her that this was MY recovery and that things were going to go MY pace..MY comfort and MY needs.....
Also re: honoring the male parent....I told her since she threw the bible at me, I told her to read Leviticus 18:29......"EVERYONE who does these detestable things MUST be cut off from their own people"....
I told her that YES...I need to stop the "name calling" bad references about him and thus keeping the event in my present
YES..I am in fervent prayer to give up hate/resentment
and YES...I want to focus on ME, MY recovery....NOT worry about trying to "honor" someone who never lived a life of honour...
I am FINE with me.....
I told her that we had to work this according to MY needs or we could lovingly detach and say goodbye......
I TOOK CHARGE OF MY RECOVERY.............YAAAAAY!!! AND---- I did it by keeping the focus on my needs....how her "orders" made me feel and what changes I needed for us to continue to work together
I am getting "grey" now in my thinking....not just black and white....I left the door open...It is now her choice........*suggestions* rather than orders work better for me....Also the *suggestion* has to be FEASIBLE.....her telling me to "honor" somebody like that is ludicrous.....Like Kitty said "honour is like trust....it is EARNED"....
All of you who answered that post, showed me that I am "OK" and on the "right track".....I think so!!! I feel OK with me and my progress.......HP is cool with me too!!!
AMEN, you guys.....and my sister gave me a ration of S$%$ over it, and I just said "chill!!! I am ok....I got what HP needed for me to get....Get over it"
We began to fight like I felt she was defending this shrink over me...I told her that I was going to exit the conversation for a while and she "chilled" and listen to me and I guess she was just worried about my recovery....I told her I had found my home HERE........and YEA the TRUTH DID SET ME FREE