The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I had a nice weekend planned at our beach home in Delaware. The weather was about 75 degrees on Saturday. My older A son went to NC for a fishing tournament. My youngerr A son lives in Japan. I could not settle my mind thinking that things were not right with either one of them. I was awake half the night on Saturdaywith the "what ifs". I truly ruiined it for myself . For the first time I realized how sick I am. None of the horrible things going on in my head happened. I thought I was doing good at detaching but realize that I only do a good job when things are good.
Well, at least I learned something very important about myself this weekend but I do need a lot of practicing on detachment.....good and bad times.
If I have learned anything from this board and from my few face to face meetings is that it takes time. YOU WILL GET THERE. It's wonderful that you can work the program through good times (that's alot more then some people) and eventually you will work the program through both good times and bad times. I think I read this quote on the board here it's something along the lines of "you can do the next right thing." I take that as not beating yourself up about this past weekend and just try to dif into your al anon tool box as much as you can this week to prepare you for your next weekend. That quote applies to other things as well. I will have you and your serenity in my prayers. You will get there. I can't say that enough to you. It may help for you to say it to yourself over and over. I say the serenity prayer over and over until I fall asleep at night and that makes me feel serene. Best wishes.
I am so sorry that you could not enjoy your weekend. Detachment is difficult.
I always found that forcing myself to stay in the moment, in the day helped to focus my mind to where my feet and body happened to be.
As was suggested- just repeating the serenity prayer over and over or a simple slogan also helped to relieve the doom and gloom and irrational fear associated with this disease.
I am glad your fears were unfounded. Easy does it and progress not perfection are my favorite slogans today
Thanks for sharing
-- Edited by hotrod on Monday 20th of April 2009 12:42:14 PM
Sorry you didn't have a good weekend. Sometimes I am mine own worst memory. I've had a lot of that stincking thinking lately. I need to work harder at my program so I can move ahead rather than backwards. Sometimes it's a struggle though. Hopefully we'll both get it back. Love and blessings to you and your family.
Lives strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty
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It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
I Know when I am like that, I need to pick something up and read, even if just for a moment, a daily reader is great, I can pick my currant topic on my mind, and put my whole self in the words, helps me remember were I am at the NOW, and were I heading for the THEN...
Taking Care of you is one everyone tells me, but I am truly a stranger to it... I do stand up for myself a little more, and don't get shoved into things as easily, but the hole caring for your self is still a mystery i have yet to solve...
I too am struggling with Detachment, somedays I am ruler of my own world and next days I honestly think I could care less, and then once in a while, they sneak back into your head, and just wont go away... I continue to read detachment OVER & OVER & OVER, the whole thing, it helps me remember what it is I am detaching from... That followed by the serenity prayer usually pushes me thru...
Love & Prayers you can find your inner peace Friends in Recovery... Jozie
As time goes on, I am amazed how powerful this disease is. I also am willing to acknowledge that the best thing for me to do, anymore, is keep coming back. It is tough to admit that my mind has so much power over me. But it is a good thing. I can have a good attitude, a good perspective, a good outlook, etc. My mind is the most powerful (or destructive) tool in my arsenal. I do everything I can to choose wisely.
Hate you had one of those weekends - that's tough to get thru, Honey!!
But remember Progress Not Perfection - Awareness, Acceptance then Action.
You became aware of your feelings. You have accepted this is part of something you & your HP can work on Now, you have a wonderful program of recovery that can take action try to handle things with some other solutions.
You are an awesome strong woman -I know that you will learn what your HP is wanting to show you!!
HUGS & love, Rita
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No matter what me and my God are going to be ok, even better than OK -
Hello Gailey - when i get rotissary brain *you know lay down your head to sleep and everything just rolls over and over again * I give my head a shake and remind myself that feelings are_____not facts then I ask God to help me sleep and take care of my sons or who ever it is that is troubling me . Louise
. For the first time I realized how sick I am. None of the horrible things going on in my head happened. I thought I was doing good at detaching but realize that I only do a good job when things are good.
