I Can't Keep All The Balls In The Air....... - Al-Anon Family Group

DreamsOver · Senior Member

I Can't Keep All The Balls In The Air.......

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Hi DreamsOver

I am so very sorry that you are going thru this. I remember it well. Please try to get to an alanon meeting and remember that you truly are powerless over this disease. Saying teh serenity prayer, and living one day at a time really helped me.

Please take care of yourself, focus on what you need to do to take care of you and put first things first.

You and your family are in my prayers.

Jerry F · ~*Service Worker*~

Aloha DO...Wow what a lot of weight to carry only....you don't hafta carry the
weight. You can get out from under and the last of the weight is the phone
receiver or the cell phone or whatever you are using to tie yourself up with
the problem. If it is electronic it has an off button and no rules that say you
can only hang up after you are good and abused. He was right if he was
talking about "his" needs. He needs to be allowed to fullfill them all by and
for himself. He will be sooooo blessed when he does.

If you stayed on the phone to the point that your head hurt, you stayed on
too long.

(((((hugs))))) smile

abbyal · ~*Service Worker*~

Can't keep all the balls in the air. Drop the ones that don't have your name on it. Paying his bills won't stop until u stop it . There is no reason for him to change as your doing everything for him . Until we stop enabling ablsolutley nothing will change except that the demands will get higher and more often . Absolutley nothing will change until SOME ONE CHANGES

Christy · ~*Service Worker*~

Feel free to use one of my lines...

"The First National Bank of Mom is closed" :)

Jean4444 · ~*Service Worker*~

Visualize wrapping him up in a lovely soft warm blanket and passing him to HP like a sleeping baby...Hugs, J.

Karilynn · ~*Service Worker*~

((((DO))),

At some point he has to learn to stand on his own 2 feet. If he stumbles and falls, so be it. Caller ID was one of the best inventions. When people call that I don't want to be engaged with, I don't answer the phone. I choose not to. That's how I keep the serenity in my life. Love and blessings to you and your family.

Live strong,

Karilynn & Pipers Kitty

Tenderheartsks · ~*Service Worker*~

Christy wrote:

Feel free to use one of my lines...

"The First National Bank of Mom is closed" :)

I love that line! Oldest AD never calls anymore for monetary help-the bank has been closed a long long time here. biggrin

DreamsOver · Senior Member

Thanks everyone, but if I don't answer the phone he comes over to my house.

I love "The First National Bank of Mom" is CLOSED.

I had to chuckled about the mental picture of wrapping him up in a soft warm blanket and handing him over to my HP. I could just visualize him kicking and screaming like he did when he was a baby, but with his now grown up face.

Love to you all.

clara · Senior Member

Well, I can certainly relate to being abused on the phone. And I can relate to your situation of having a child with an addiction problem. My daughter is an alcholic. She will call me and tell me the most outrageous things that hurt my feelings. So, I finally figured out that is why I pay for called ID. So, if I am not in the mood to be abused(who ever is), I simply do not pick up the phone.

Several weeks ago, she wanted to come live with us. She is 37 years old; has no job(she is a teacher) and husband has kicked her out. I told her that it hurts me to say "no", but that was my only choice. I could not and would not let her bring the drinking or the verbal abuse into my peaceful home.

You know, sometimes you have to let them fall and hit rock bottom for them to get better. You have no responsibility to provide him a place to live, a car, pay for his tickets(he got them, not you).

Let go and Let God.

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.