The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hi All! This week I am devoting it to keeping my mouth shut. I am practicing the anonymity part of the program. I am so used to being an open book. You ask, I tell. You don't ask, I share. So far, so good. I feel like people at work and my friends know too much of my business. But that is my own fault. I want to change that.
I did really good when I went eat out with my friends on Saturday. I was happy, talked about stuff, nothing in general. But I noticed that my friend didn't have much to say. It seemed like since I wasn't complaining or being sad she had nothing to say. I used to get the impression that misery loved company. I don't think I was good company because I wasn't miserable.
Now at work, that is a different thing. I am trying to deach from these people and just do my job. BUT my job is to make sure they do their job. And unfortunately, they just show up for a paycheck and could care less about a career. SO THERE, if i am not fussing about somthing going on in my life, I am fussing about them not taking the bull by the horns.
Anonymity....it's nobodys business what is going on in my life or my A's life. My friends will have to accept that if I am happy, I am happy. My staff will just have to learn that if I am upset about them not being productive, it has nothing to do with my life outside of work.
Great Share. You are absolutely right with your obsevations. I too found that my "friends" were only really interested in hearing unhappy stories and when I stopped I noticed they too had nothing to say.
With an open mind we start to really grow and change.
I too have disclosed too much about me and my A's issues. I realise now that when people ask 'how are you' I shouldnt tell them all my buisness. I always believed my friends would keep my confidence, now I know thats not the case. I dont want my pain to be a source of gossip any longer. I deserve better. Your post has just made me realise I've been playing up the victim role, by behaving in this way.
Great Share... Thanks... That is one that i have never really thought on... :( But there is a time for everything I suppose.. Some one just turned me on to the Al-anon workbook, hope to check one of those out at my next meeting.. :)
I am that same person... Just Like that... Never gave it much thought really, always figured... If ya wont to know I'll tell ya, and that's that "nothing to hide"lol... So maybe I can now, "THINK" before I speak, take notice to what and when I say things...I have always been very optionated, lol... About EVERYTHING :) but that would be a great place to start for me as well...
You show great stength in doing so, and I have noticed that since I have brought the "Drama" down a notch, my conversations are ALOT less interesting :) But Its all good...When there is nothing to say, I remember to be {Patient}... Another trait I am working on...lol...
Thanks again for Lifting my thoughts on the day... Keep up the Great Work.. ~Works If You Work It I Hear~ :)
Friends In Recovery... One Day At A Time... Love & Prayers Jozie
