The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
So, my AH's dealer called me like every day to try and get a hold of him, cause he owned him money. One day I just got tires of having to talk to that dumb*** so I gave him the A's office number. I guess the dealer has been calling nonstop, cause my AH called and he was furious!! He asked me if I gave the dealer his number, and I said yes. OMG!! He totally snapped!!! Basically told me that guy was ceazy and that I had gooten him in alot of trouble at work, and that I should remember that he needs to work to support our daughter. And that I could go to hell.
I didn't say anything, except that I was tired of that guy calling me. I feel sad. I know it is NOT my fault and that he has to deal with his debts, but a tiny part of my mind says: I'ts your fault!!
Whatever, I'm just gonna wait until he calls me and not stress about it. I'm gonna try, at least.
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Self-pity in its early stages is as snug as a feather mattress. Only when it hardens does it become uncomfortable.
Aloha Priscilla...Great change!! He may not have liked it...that's not required. What is required is that YOU Change!! Yowzers you did!! Put the responsiblity right where it belonged. No they don't like it when their protections system breaks down. It takes many people to keep the alcoholic/addict insulated from the consequences of their actions. When the ring of enabling breaks down they have to respond and either change or get worse. (((((great practice))))).
Go to that tiny part of your mind that is still saying that it's your fault and quietly tell it, "This is the last time I'm going to tell you,...You're wrong, it's not my fault and you have to leave; good bye." It will pass.
Keep on practicing, practicing, practicing...it makes progress.
I agree well done , there is no reason why u should have to feel threatened by these phone calls or harrased on a daily basis . this is your husb problem he caused it he can fix it . * hugs *
