The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hello everyone, this is my first visit and I would like some direction. My husband is a very serious drinker, starts first thing in the morning, and is drunk about 5 days a week. He lost is driving license when he went to pick up our daughters from school! He drinks at work and as we work together in our own business I see it. I don't shout, don't throw plates, and don't threaten to leave. I would really like to video record him drunk, so he can see how ridiculous he looks. He is a loving husband, great father, good provider and works very very hard. What can I do for him. We live in a remote island, AA would not be available even if he agreed to go. He says he will cut back on drinking most days!
Glad you found us! You are in the right place. Al-anon is for families and friends of alcoholics, we find in al-anon ways that we can take care of ourselves whether the alcoholic is still drinking or not. We soon learn the three C's of al-anon: We did cause it, we can't cure it and we can't control it. We practice the 12 steps of al-anon adapted after the 12 steps of AA. If you can't get to a face to face al-anon meeting on your remote island, remember that there are meetings here in the chat room Monday-Friday 9 a.m. e.s.t. and 9 p.m. e.s.t. there are also meetings on Saturday and Sunday, just check the schedule at the top of the page. I highly recommend attending them, or just get in the chat room and talk with someone, because the first thing we learn in al-anon is we can't change the alcoholic, that alcoholism is a disease and that is a progressive disease at that. All we can do is detach with love and let them find their bottom and get help. Even if you were to video record him drunk, it probably wouldn't change anything. The only thing you can change is you. Keep coming back and posting. It Works if you Work it. So Work it your worth it! Is one of our little sayings.
Jave has given you many road to travel, and all are wonderful, so take your time and see what it feels like to focus on YOU... You will be amazed at the differents this program can make in your life if you "Work IT"...
I hope to hear more of your shares and hope that you keep coming back
Welcome home Perrier...I have seen the video confrontation work in one case years ago. The friend whose daughter recorded his Christmas drunk showed it in front of the family (it was a family video) and my friend was humiliated. It took a bit more for him to stop completely but he did tell me about the video waking him up to how seriously sick he looked and acted.
Don't be too sure about where program is before looking around. AA and Al-Anon are in about every nook and cranny on the planet. Where ever there is another drunk looking to stay sober there might also be a meeting. Call the local Hospital and ask them.
Dear Java, your reply was a real help, thanks, when you talk about the illness being progressive, - presumably it gets worse and worse as time goes on. My husband has always drank alot, but in the past 3 years I see a different pattern, one he is not in control of anymore. I am afraid that our business, which is in the public eye, will finish as a result of his drinking. I have tried to get friends to talk to him - man to man - but this has little effect. We left Britain 2 years ago to start a new life, about the same time as he lost his driving licence. and I really believed a new start was what he needed, it seems to have made matters worse! thank you for your help.
Hello everyone, this is my first visit and I would like some direction. My husband is a very serious drinker, starts first thing in the morning, and is drunk about 5 days a week. He lost is driving license when he went to pick up our daughters from school! He drinks at work and as we work together in our own business I see it. I don't shout, don't throw plates, and don't threaten to leave. I would really like to video record him drunk, so he can see how ridiculous he looks. He is a loving husband, great father, good provider and works very very hard. What can I do for him. We live in a remote island, AA would not be available even if he agreed to go. He says he will cut back on drinking most days!
