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Post Info TOPIC: Another scared, lonely and sleepless night coming on


Senior Member

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Posts: 188
Date:
Another scared, lonely and sleepless night coming on


Daughter is supposed to go into hospital Thursday.  She will not talk to me; I guess she is mad because I did not take her into my home.  If I had, we would be no where near the idea of rehab.  She would be in back bedroom drunk and I would be wondering what to do.

Several years ago she worked in a cute little shop with this woman that could have been her grandmother.  Sad to say this lady passed away.  She remained close to her friends husband.  They would have him over for supper, etc, back and forth.  I have never met this gentleman.  I did meet his wife before she passed away.

Well, when daughter was down to no where to go, she remembered this gentleman.  I assume he is 70 - 75 years.  I worried about his age.  I was afraid Jennifer would cause him to have a stroke or a heart attack.  However, he is no shrinking violet.  He knows lots on addiction.  He said he lost a son to addiction. 

It is his gentleman that is instrumental in getting Jennifer into rehab.  I am sure he called Jen's husband and told him to come take of his responsibilities.  I am just assuming that is how it all came down.

Now, I know I am supposed to take one day at a time; but I am a Mom and Mom's have a difficult time with this.  After her 28 days are up in rehap., what happens then?  Remember her husband kicked her out of the house.  She has no job; no apartment, no money.  Will she go to a half way house.  I know I am borrowing worried and I know I have enough to worry about this very hour!!!!

it is near midnight and I am no where near going to sleep.  Someone let me know what happens when they leave rehap and have no where to go?


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Clara

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What don't kill you, makes you stronger!!! 



~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 3854
Date:

Go to sleep clara , she is his wife  he is responsible for her care , he will have to pay for her treatment and aftercare or she can go back home she does live there too , not much he can do about that .  she will be okay thats why we have lawyers . 

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I came- I came to-I came to be



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1917
Date:

Let go and Let GOD is all I can tell you Clara! God is the only one who can deal with this. I know this is easier said than done but please walk your talk re: your faith in a power greater than yourself. Visualize wrapping your daughter up in a beautiful warm blanket and handing her over to God. Turn and walk away. She is in the BEST HANDS and they are NOT YOURS. Hugs, J.

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Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 188
Date:

Jeanne, I have turned my daughter over to God, now I need to turn myself over to him too.  I have a very strong spirituial faith.  Truly believe in my God.  Sometimes I wonder if I have truly turned my daughter over to Him, since I am still so scared and worried. 

I did have a surprising good sleep last night, but daughter was the first thought this morning and so far has been my only thought.  I am sad, scared and depressed.  

Husband has been very supportive.  He is her step dad, although he raised her from the time she was 10 and is by all means her Dad.  In fact, she has a better relationship with him, then she has with me.  Eventhough he loves her dearly, I do not think he has the same level of fear, etc as i do.  And I do not hold this against him.  Mine is true motherly love and nothing trumps that.

One day at a time; right now, it is one minute at a time for me.  I will be ok however because of my HP.

Thanks all for the support.      


__________________

Clara

------------------------------------
What don't kill you, makes you stronger!!! 



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 4578
Date:

Clara: Your daughter is safe. Now it is time for you to learn new skills. Detaching is one of them.   You can learn how to do that at www.coping.org.

The issue is what happens to your daughter is up to her.  You can find a way to cope with al anon tools but you have to learn them and practice them.

Maresie.

__________________
maresie


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 580
Date:

(((Clara))))  just want to send you  hugggsheart.gif  know that you are loved.  This is a step for her that will help her to learn to take care of her *self. 
your a wonderful mom for caring in the way that you have...that you do.
 To let Go and Let God do his work now... is not easy.. but is sooo worth it. nod.gif 
Detaching with love is the best thing you can do for her right now..giggle.gif and for yourself.   pray.gif a step that will change you  and will change her  hopefully to help her grow and learn of her own strengths  on her own. 

flowerpot.gifwill keep you in thought  for strength... and to focus on taking care of You.  is very important you keep your faith sun.gifand your health in balance.floating.gif

ps; make those face to face meetings, especially now.. and get those handshake.gifhugs and all that unconditional loveheart.gif only other alanon members date.gifcan give yas.

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Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 450
Date:

Weeping may last the night, but rejoyce comes in the morning!

Psalms 30

It has helped me many sleepless nights.

HUGS,,,

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With love in recovery, 

Sincerely

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