The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I did want I have been going to Al-Anon for and coming to this board.
I phoned daughter and told her she could not come here. I do not think she was shocked. I think she saw it coming. She said Brad was sending the divorce papers to our house. I will "return to sender". I am completely out of this mess that they have created. I will no longer be the "go between".
I am not bragging about what I did; it was not easy. However it was something that I had no choice in. This is what I am going to Al-Anon for. It gives me strength and permission to make the decisions I make, no matter what they are.
I guess I gave my daughter permission to hit rock bottom now, because that is where she is headed. Thanks for all your support in the past difficult days. I am sure my difficult days are not over yet and you will get tired of me.
Love you all, Clara
__________________
Clara
------------------------------------ What don't kill you, makes you stronger!!!
Clara I admire your strength. A couple of years ago my brother went throught a rought patch and did a lot of unaaceptable things to my parens, me and my children. In the end we had to do tough love it was the ardest thing we have ever had to do. We sat at the table eating our christmas dinner knowing he was at an hoste all alone. We stuck to our boundaries and hey presto it worked. He now has his own place, a girlfriends and treats us all with respect .iit was so hard but we detached with love and he turned himself around he had no other option.
I hope your daughter one day realises like my brother how lucky she is to have a mother who doesnt enable her!
We wont get sick of ya... They haven't got sick of me yet so I guess your good... lol...
Good for you for sticking to your guns and let'n your daughter stand on her own.. I am sure it took more strength then you thought you had but good for you for sticking in there...
Keep coming back it works if you work it.... One Day at a Time... Jozie
Clara, I've learned that it is okay to feel comfortable in making and sticking to boundaries that are right for you. I've also heard it said that once we step back and work our own program and our own relationship with our HP, that it is then that the A's HP no longer has our interference to compete with and can stand with our A's along their own path. Your aD has been given a gift from you.