The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
In July of 08 I first came to alanon a huge mess. Alanon has helped me clear up my vision. I was advised not to make a major decision for at least 6 months after coming to alanon. Well, its 8 months.....my thoughts are the same....I'm ready to have a life without my A Hubby. He's been going to AA and is still very active. It's just too much for me. I'm 37, no children and can financially support myself. My dreams for our marriage was to be a wife and mother. His alcholism has robbed me of being a mother, he is infertile. My purpose in life is not to be the wife of an alcholic. I don't want to mother a sick grown man. It would be easier to leave my home and just start over than to have him court ordered to leave. I did say before that I would not leave my home again. I'm a little confused about that, but this house is only material. I'm ready for better than this. I gave him an ultimatium on Sunday, that on Friday if he is not in an inpatient program, I am filing fr divorce. It Wednesday and TODAY, I want OUT! Sincerely, Tonya
It sounds as if you have taken time, worked your program and have clarity on what is right for you. It is always noted that the right answer will surface when you are ready and there will be no question if it is right for you.
I know you set a time table for his seeking help and that you are planning on attending an alanon retreat this weekend.
Please continue with your plan of attending the retreat, I believe this is exactly what will help you in the days to come. Live ODAT, Let Go of Fear and Let GOd resolve your conflict about leaving your home.
Please keep coming back and sharing you are worth it.
-- Edited by hotrod on Wednesday 18th of March 2009 10:14:45 AM
Like Betty I hope that you continue to make it to the retreat...I also feel that would be a great thing, and truthfully I can't wait to hear about it :)
You sounds as tho you have given yourself time to reflect and are making a decission based on what you want, so how can that be wrong... Some people can and some can't... I to am one that would rather let them keep the "things" and get out to make it on my own...
I so understand wanted kids, I have always wanted children, I only ended up having one son and he is the apple of my eye... I wish you luck with your future plans and will be sure to keep you in my prayers....
Please Keep Coming Back no matter what your choice...It works if you work it... :) Friends in Recovery... Jozie...
You've come to a hard decision. It seems as though you have taken your time and worked your program. When the time is right you will know it. I hope you will continue with your program even after you leave. It took much longer than than 8 months for you to be affected by this disease. I am a widow as of last year, and I still find I need my program. I know how it is wanting to be out of the chaos. We all want that serenity. Keep doing what is best for you, and all will be well. Love and blessings to you.
Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty
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It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
