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I moved out of my A husbands house a week ago. Yesterday we went out to buy our daughter new shoes, and he started drinking. He started to tell me that we could work it out but I had to change and learn how to handle him. That I had to learn how to keep him clam and in the house, and that he couldn't believe that after 6 years I still didn't know how to do that. He also told me that he was super focused on work, stikll drinking to take the presuure off, but super responsable and that he was moving into a serious condo, were he couldn't party. I know that everything he told me are excuses, but I can't help but wonder, Is it true this time? I don't know, I feel sad for him, and for me, and confused. I need help and support.
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Self-pity in its early stages is as snug as a feather mattress. Only when it hardens does it become uncomfortable.
Welcome (((((((((((priscilla)))))))))))), you are absolutely in the right place. You know how you say you know it's an excuse, but in the same breath wonder if it's for real? That's Step One - admitting we're powerless over alcohol (ouch) and that our lives have become unmanageable (oh yeah).
Use the search button in the burgundy menu bar to look for posts with the word "new" and see what rings true for you. You'll probably notice a lot of suggestions to find an f2f (face to face) meeting near you, FOR you. That can definitely help you get out of the crazymaking whirlwind, and into a calmer place we call serenity. There are links to various states' and countries' alanon websites (with meeting lists) at al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/meeting.htm
Good luck, & I hope we see you again soon. Just wanted to greet you and give you hug - that's what those ((((((((((( ))))))))))) are.
I think, largely, you've answered alot of your own questions. He says one thing, does another. He expects you to believe what he says, then does things that aren't credible. He behaves in ways that aren't honest, and then demands it from you. This logic doesn't wash, and you know this. I think you're feeling scared about being a single parent for the first time, as anyone would be. I understand the fear. I think it's normal & rational. But I also think you're more capable than you know. I think you're going to find out, as you utilize al anon, that you're a very smart, very competent woman who can do amazing things for her daughter and herself, with or without a partner. The key will be time. Hang in, keep us posted, and you're doing fine.
I think, largely, you've answered alot of your own questions. He says one thing, does another. He expects you to believe what he says, then does things that aren't credible. He behaves in ways that aren't honest, and then demands it from you. This logic doesn't wash, and you know this.
Hey Tiger! Long time no see! I guess you have been posting but I haven't and didn't come across your posts the fews times I've been around lately.
He speaks of all the changes you should make and except, but I didn't here any thing much from his other then "He plans to moved to a condo" welp... I believe the bests thing you can do, is get to a F2F, and talk to people that are struggling just like you, and Us... And the more focus you put on your self. The happier you will find yourself...
Hold your head up... And keep coming back... It works if you work it....
Missing out....
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Forgiveness- Isn't about forgettingwhat happened,its about Giving Up,All Hope,of a Better Past!
