The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
For a while now I've been thinking about doing step 4 again. When I first did it last year, I used an alanon book that helped me think through my inventory - a workbook of soughts. It was very helpful.
Over the weekend, I took a look at what I noted down as my character defects and really had to laugh. Can you believe that when I assessed how I did in the area of Responsibility, I thought I was doing fine. No problems there! Unbelievable! This coming from a woman who has no problem taking care of her own responsibilities and those of EVERYONE else around her
So when I first did my step 4, I didn't know myself as well as I thought. I wonder what other delusions and denials I have about myself. I also didn't share my step 4 with my sponsor - I didn't have one back then. I'm thinking it might help me be a bit more grounded in reality.
Maybe this will also help me focus o me now that my AH is out of hospital and has relapsed again. Prayers for him please MIP family
R38, I have the Blueprint beside my bed. I have been writing in it for years now. Its fascinating to go back and see what I have written at different times in my life. I use different colors of pencil/pens at different times. It really shows how much I have changed and it also shows me where I really haven't. Its a great workbook and a part of my toolbox. Hugs, J.
I have always been over responsible for others. I am really looking at setting huge distance from a neighbor who is not taking care of himself (the latest saga is driving a car without brakes). Before I would have gone overtime to take care of him, now I am running the other way. One really core issue for me is to keep super busy with my own stuff then I am less tempted to get into anyone else's behavior.
Don't feel bad Rocky same thing happened to me , which only re enforsed the idea that I didn't have a clue who I was . The inventory revealed to me that most of it was HIS opinion of who I was and what I was like when i looked back like u did I laughed and cried at the answers ( i was like you being as honest as I could at the time ) thank God as we continue to work this program our mind clears and a sence of desperation and honesty take over and we do find out who we really are - flaws and all . Step 4 is not about how bad we are it's who we are and when we know that we can change what we don't l ike . and sharring it with asponsor is the only way to fly in m y opinion - occasionally we have been known to beat our selves up sponsors will stop us from doing that and look at things in thier true perspective . good luck Louise