Clearly, a loved ones sobriety does not solve our problems, nor does physical separation or even death. Even those of us who have not been involved with any alcoholics for many years find that we continue to be affected by the family disease. In short, the effects alcoholism----obsession, anxiety, anger, denial, and feelings of guilt-----tend to persist until we seek recovery  for ourselves.

The drama of other peoples problems can be very distracting, especially when those people are alcoholics. But in alanon we discover that the problem does not lie solely with another person: the problem is also with us. The behaviour of an alcoholic friend, spouse, child, sibling, employer, or parent may have led us to alanon, but we soon realize that our own thinking has become distorted. Alanon helps us to stop wasting time trying to change the things over which we have no control and to put our efforts to work where we do have some power----------over our own lives.

gardengal