The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I used and sometimes still am a people pleaser. I am trying to fulfill others needs and many times I forget about myself and taking care of me. I give and give until I'm exhausted and then when no one says thanks I get upset. Sometimes I help people trying to help and people still get mad at me. But, that's life I can't please people all the time and I shouldn't have to. Now I take time for myself. I come online and read the shares, right now I'm having my tea and reading them lol. I spend time with my HP I make the time to do it now because it's become a really important thing for me to do. I meditate and sit in silence sometimes I'll just look out the window and be grateful for the fall leaves changing and sometimes I'll see a bunny or a cute squirrel. I appreciate those moments more now and that I take the time for myself to do those things. Also thinking about this topic "taking care of me" I realized that I give so much to my boss who is also my aunt. Yesterday I was shocked she must have told me 5 or 6 times "what would we do without your help." It shocked me because she never says things like that to me. The main reason I've stayed working for her is because her business has been so busy and every time she needed me to stay and I didn't want to leave when she really needed my help. But, I've asked my HP about this and I believe that after the new year I will be looking for work somewhere else. I think that is what "taking care of me" is all about. Not being selfish but also not allowing others to manipulate and control me. Also tonight I think I will be going to a college group. Since I'm in my 20's and I will try to interact more with people my own age "for me." Thanks for letting me share.
Glad you brought it up. I was just talking to my sponsor about not taking care of myself. Breath in, breath out. I don't have to say no to me and yes to others. I don't have to stay buried at work. Good for you.
I like that you point out that basking in the glory and beauty of nature and what wonder it has to offer is a way to spend time with HP. This is a reminder to me, to do more of that!
I can relate very much. I am so happy for you that you are looking at this. I've found it really hard going to address my people pleasing. I am also constantly in karpmans either rescuing, feel a victim or feeling resentful. I have to work super hard not to be there but most days I am not. I couldn't even imagine not wanting to be there before because that was the only familiar place.
