The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I did it how it was suggested to me. Go to meetings and listen. Keep an open mind and watch for the person who has some of the qualities I lack and would like in my life and then...gulp...ask if they would agree to be my sponsor. If they say yes learn how to listen one on one again with an open mind and with trust. Don't expect them to be perfect and have no expectations that I would get it all overnight but over time...one day at a time. Stay in contact and share needs and concerns and growth. Be grateful and humble (teachable) and practice, practice, practice. If they are not helpful, lovingly turn them in for another and rerun the cycle. Allow them to be as human as you are and when they seem in need share with them what you learned from them if it worked. Don't ever idolize a sponsor or you might set them up and surely yourself for failure.
Sponsors are not God or your HP. They are you with a bit more polish a bit more of the time.
I agree with jerry , go to meetings as many diff ones as u can ,listen get to know people over coffee if the group goes after the meeting. Sponsor should go to meetings on a reg basis , have worked thier way thru the steps and live them on a daily basis . When u feel u can trust someone , when they speak u can relate with them , there is someone out there waiting to be asked . If you find someone who meets your needs , don't take it personally if they say NO not at this time ,sometimes they have a full plate and would not do your relationship justice ( sponsor and sponcee) keep looking and listening . goodluck Louise A sponsor is a guide who will take u thru the steps , she will help u get your life back on track .
I knew that I needed a sponsor. I choose one who had a similar background as me that is she had sons in the military when my son had gone overseas. It turns out that we have a lot in common.
I have a temporary sponser online right now. But you just have to go to meetings and pick someone yout trust. It's important you feel comftorable with the person.