I need your prayers, please! - Al-Anon Family Group

joyoma · Veteran Member

I need your prayers, please!

lmw · Senior Member

((((((((((Joyoma))))))))))

You are in my thoughts and prayers. While it's difficult to concentrate on yourself, please, please, please try! You are SO worth it. And when you win this battle, you'll be much better prepared to handle the issues with the rest of your family that are truly yours to handle.

If an airplane is in trouble, the emergency routines call for putting on your own oxygen mask before assisting anyone else - you can't help them if you can't breathe! Please, breathe!

Linda

nal · Senior Member

((Joyoma))-- sending prayers your way.
Nancy

maresie · ~*Service Worker*~

As far as I know your daughter in law seems to hold a lot of power in the threats. Of course it is hard to listen to them. The A who I was with always threatened to leave me. He did of course all the time but it was the 'threat' that held all the power.

De-taching and resting is such hard work. I am looking forward to this holiday so that I can get some rest. All the need to please, placate and more has gone for me.

I have no control over your son, your family or your health but I do hope you will give yourself some time and space right now no matter what else is going on. There is always something. I have to de-tach from the economy, the future, the present, the bills, the health issues, the dental issues, the eye issues, the dog issues, the neighbor issues, what will I do next. Some days I just have to focus on taking care of me because I need to be rested and cared for in order to deal with those issues.

Sending you much love and prayers.

Maresie.

leo · ~*Service Worker*~

Sending hugs - don't be scared to tell the other members of your family that your own health is going to take priority. You are not being selfish. Listen to the needs of your body and when it tells you to rest back off from everyone else's problems and find a quiet room (if you can). Luv Leo xx

debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

oh Joy my heart goes out to you.

Yes it is true and you know it anyway, the best healing environment is a loving one.

You are the only one who knows what you need to do, and how to do it.

Do you have disabled services in your area? Also have you contacted the cancer society? They have lots of things to make you more comfortable for zero costs.

forgive me, I can't remember A's age. You know your options. Hon the A disease sucks the life from healthy people.

Is the dil so bad that the child cannot go with her, at least for awhile to give you and hubby a break? Services to clean your house, cook your meals?

When my mother was ill, I told her i would do anything for her. Take her to Hawaii, hire massage therapists, anything. But she wanted to be home, safe, warm with all her kids around her. And her two cats...

What do YOU want? Your son would be fine out on his own. A or not. He surely has the strength inside of him to get out and take care of himself for awhile.

I am only thinking options. never ever telling you what to do.

let go and let god. the three c's. sometimes letting go of others stuff for awhile helps us to think better.

Anyway I send you love every day to heal you. I wish for you every morn, you look out the window and see something beautiful for a little while.

love,debilyn

nmike · ~*Service Worker*~

(((((joyoma)))

Take care of you so you can be there for your grandchild. All the best.

In support,
Nancy

Jerry F · ~*Service Worker*~

Prayers and thoughts for you Joyoma and a question? What would it be like
for you if you cared for yourself like you care for others? You should you
know. Just to be fair and just.

((((hugs))))) smile

Jean4444 · ~*Service Worker*~

My best thoughts and prayers are with you. Know you are surrounded by healing love at all times. Hugs, J.

Gailey · ~*Service Worker*~

((((Joyoma))))

My prayers are with you. I am so sorry for the news you received. I am praying that your family members will help you to take care of yourself. Please try not to listen to dil's threats. I have always thought that she needs you so much in order to keep up her lifestyle. Does she even know how sick you have been?

If she goes through with the threats then you will find some other way to see your grandchild while your son is not involved. You have no control and you cannot drive yourself so far down that you will not have the strength to do anything.

Try to think of only yourself for at least today. Push all other thoughts out of your mind when they pop in. I am sure you son can take care of his dad's needs for just one day. Maybe you could get a hotel room for a night and be by yourself. You have had so much stress this year. You need some quiet time.

Love...Gail

Karilynn · ~*Service Worker*~

((((((Joyoma)))),

Many, many prayers are coming your way. Please take care of yourself first. I know how hard it can be. But in the long run, it will be best for all of you. I'm sorry your son drank, but as a concelor once told me (the A was saying that I "triggered him to drink"), your son is responsible for how he handles the "triggers" in his life. He can reach out to AA or a support group. Surround yourself with people who can love and support you. There are groups out there who can help you get through this. Clinical trials can be a great thing. That's how all treatments get their start. Don't give up hope. I know how incredibly scary this can be for you. Taking care of you is the first priority. Please, please go to www.laf.org. It's an incredible warehouse of information and support. It is uplifting, life affirming and offers tons of information and support. It will help you with every aspect of your illness. Meanwhile, your Alanon family will say extra prayers for you. Don't give up the hope. Don't give up the fight. Life is so worth it. Much love and blessings to you and your family.

Live strong,
Karilynn & Pipers Kitty

joyoma · Veteran Member

I appreciate all of you so much, your kind thoughts and prayers.

My son's EX just stopped by and brought the baby. The little guy has been in a walking cast and just got it off this morning. I sent her e-mail yesterday with my news. She is sympathetic and her attitude was subdued at this point. She said she just doesn't know what to say....I understand that.

My son has gone into seclusion evidently. He isn't answering his phone so I haven't been able to tell him about the return of the cancer and I won't leave a message like that. He does this from time to time when he is trying to pull his act together once more. I guess I should be grateful for some peace and quiet.

My resolve is quite strong today that I must put myself first. Karilynn, I do visit the laf site as well as others.

Thanks again. ODAT

serendipity · ~*Service Worker*~

Warm thoughts and prayers comming your way.

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